Hi Kate! My Name is Gerri and I'm brand new here in the forum. Literally, just this minute joined. After discovering the BWS website and this forum, I knew it was for me. I can really relate to your situation. My husband is an alcoholic. His past mistakes have taken a tremendous toll on our marriage, children and finances. We recently went through a brief separation. We are back together again, but as I knew in my gut he would, fell off the wagon. I know that he tries as hard as he is capable of doing, but without the help he really needs, he is not going to be able to do it on his own. I can really identify with the "spouse-friend" part.
I was so exhausted of being a spouse, the resentment, the anger, I couldn't do it anymore. But being who I am, the friend part feels like I can't abandon him. Maybe that is not a good thing, but for now, it's a decision I have made and will live with. This all going on at a time in my life when I am "searching for myself", trying to find out what I want to do at this stage of my life. I've always had this desire to try writing, and will be starting some online classes next week. I am reading, researching, praying and soul searching. My past, my current situation, life changes, my kids, certainly give me a lot of material to work with. Please pray that I can make wise decisions and find success. I am happy to read that you are working through your situation and that your husband is doing well!
God Bless!
Gerri