Dotsie, no I didn't do it in any order. I just sat down and typed every memory as they came into my head. It was very theraputic and was a great help once she started deteriorating rapidly. I would go back to those recorded times and read them when I was down.

Now that I am past the mourning stage I've wondered if there might be a book in there somewhere. Anyway, I hope it is helpful.

Lynnie wrote:

Quote:

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Our love for each other has come full circle. What is more important than that?

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Lynnie, I think this says so much. I pray that you and your Mom continue to be at peace with each other.

Luv n hugs

Lynn,
You and your mom are in my thoughts and prayers.
Laurel

Prayers for the both of you and any other family suffering this burden. Oh why can't they find the cause and cure for this horrific disease?

My mom told us that she was not going to have any chemo or radiation when she found out she had lung cancer. By the time she found out it had already spread to other places as well.

I remember on day shortly after she had moved to the nursing center. It was a bright sunny day and we were sitting outside (while she had a cigarette ). She told me not to worry or fret that she was doing it the way she wanted to. She had been a hair stylist for a portion of her life and I think she could not bear to think of loosing her hair. And she was the kind of person that was always busy. She didn't like to just sit around so I know that's another big reason she didn't want to take treatments. She had seen enough of her friends wiped out and sick for days after treatments.

Anyway, she said we just needed to make the most of the time that was left. So that's what we tried to do.

I remember the next week she told us a funny story. She had gone outside that morning (for a cigarette ) and was trying to move the ashtray over by her chair and overbalanced and toppled over on her butt. She said people came running from everywhere thinking she had hurt herself. She thought that was pretty funny!

And another time we went to a restaurant....At that time she wasn't able to eat much and was very thin. She just ate a few bites of what she ordered and was full. When we got up to leave she said "When the waitress came to take my plate I thought about telling her I was on a diet" Too funny!

So I guess my advice is to look for the little things that are good in every day. Because they are there. You may have to look hard for them but you can find them. They may end up being some of the best things you remember.

Sometimes when things get hard for me I keep a journal. Before I go to bed I have to write one good thing that happened that day in the journal. Then, when I am feeling down, I can look back and reread all the good things that happen to me.

starting over, great idea.

ktri, just wondering how long between diagnosis and her death without treatments.

Mom was given 6-9 months and she died in about 6 1/2 and that was with treatments.

She was diagnosed with lung cancer that had spread to her ribs. Very sad story.

Mom had complaine dof pain in her chest/rib cage for months. The doctor treated her for some form of arthritis. She fell in the bathroom at home, and when they xrayed her ribs at the hospital ER they said she had indeed broken a rib, but it was eaten away by cancer. They called the oncologist in to the ER and that was the beginning of the end of her life.

ALl during the prior summer, when she phone her doctor to tell him of the pain, he told her it was the humisity. Take more pain medicine. He never did any tests.

You would think these days when cancer appears to be spreading to epidemic proportions that the doctors would rule out cancer FIRST before they start piddling around with everything else. Instead, they seem to look for the simplest reason for the symptoms, then stop there without any further investigation. I can understand that it can be like looking like a needle in a haystack, finding the culprit behind many symptoms, but I keep hearing over and over and over again, and have experienced it in both my Mom's and brother's cancers, that the doctors stopped with the first test and it took a lot of prodding to get them to investigate further. Why don't they trust the patients!!! We know our bodies, we know when something's wrong.

It took two months to get the doctors to investigate my Mom - they stopped when they found a bladder infection. I was adament that there was more going on than that - but it took almost two months before they finally investigated further and found that she was FULL of cancer, throughout her bones and spine. It was too late to treat her, but in between the original diagnosis of bladder infection and the final diagnosis of cancer, she endured much emotional suffering (one of the nurses actually accused her to her face of 'faking' it).

Same story with my brother. They stopped at the diagnosis of diabetes; it took many more trips to emergency before they finally took his concerns seriously and investigated further, and almost right away found that he had stage 4B (the most advanced) Hodgkin's Lymphoma - who knows if they had found the cancer and started chemo right away if it might have made the difference between life and death. A big part of the reason he didn't make it was because he was so weak by the time he began treatment - three months could have made a HUGE difference in how strong he would have been going into the chemo.

Anyway, sorry for the long-winded post, but this infuritates me that the doctors don't investigate further right away - especially when it's clear that cancer is so prevalent these days - and that early treatment is imperative in order to save lives.

Yes, I would agree Eagle. When they thought my mom had cancer they said they could do blood tests to check for "marker" chemicals that tell them it is likely to be cancer and I think even what type of cancer. I don't understand why they couldn't do this for your mom and brother. I would think that even if these are special blood tests, they would not be extremely expensive. Perhaps they are not good enough yet to be 100% reliable.

Dotsie, I can't remember for sure, but I believe they gave my mom 6 - 12 months and she lasted almost 18.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fin8_w153_A

Hey Princess...you mentioned this song and a certain line from it....so we found a live and purer version for you...ignore the first miniut of the video..the quality is not so good and that first bit is the end of a previose song...hope you enjoy it

This home holds you in our hearts

Celtic(with po editing for times sake)lol

I am so sorry Lynnie. I went through this same turmoil this past summer. My dad has stage 4 lung cancer and was diagnosed last August.

I will be keeping you and your family in my prayers.

Love and Hugs,
Cathi