My mom told us that she was not going to have any chemo or radiation when she found out she had lung cancer. By the time she found out it had already spread to other places as well.

I remember on day shortly after she had moved to the nursing center. It was a bright sunny day and we were sitting outside (while she had a cigarette ). She told me not to worry or fret that she was doing it the way she wanted to. She had been a hair stylist for a portion of her life and I think she could not bear to think of loosing her hair. And she was the kind of person that was always busy. She didn't like to just sit around so I know that's another big reason she didn't want to take treatments. She had seen enough of her friends wiped out and sick for days after treatments.

Anyway, she said we just needed to make the most of the time that was left. So that's what we tried to do.

I remember the next week she told us a funny story. She had gone outside that morning (for a cigarette ) and was trying to move the ashtray over by her chair and overbalanced and toppled over on her butt. She said people came running from everywhere thinking she had hurt herself. She thought that was pretty funny!

And another time we went to a restaurant....At that time she wasn't able to eat much and was very thin. She just ate a few bites of what she ordered and was full. When we got up to leave she said "When the waitress came to take my plate I thought about telling her I was on a diet" Too funny!

So I guess my advice is to look for the little things that are good in every day. Because they are there. You may have to look hard for them but you can find them. They may end up being some of the best things you remember.

Sometimes when things get hard for me I keep a journal. Before I go to bed I have to write one good thing that happened that day in the journal. Then, when I am feeling down, I can look back and reread all the good things that happen to me.