Thanks to all. The dad is out of jail and calling his son all the time saying, "I miss you, son. I love you son". He won't even speak to his "daughter" whom he allegedly harmed. She doesn't understand as this is the only "daddy" she has ever known.

Meantime the dad's family back in Omaha is afraid he will commit suicide if his son is taken out of his custody.

My daughter, the mom, is feeling like slipping up and using again over this whole thing and her probation officer is saying he sees red flags all over the place and wants her to attend aa meetings.

I'm just trying to keep things as normal as possible for the kids, trying to hold on to my job, trying to hold onto my sanity and my health.

I'll keep everyone posted. Oh, and today someone stole my grandson's bike that he loved so much and I can't afford to replace it. Poor little guy!!

Hi New Leaf,
Hopefully, you went to the doctor. Please give Katie a hug from me. Remind her that she has to put herself first so she can take care of the little ones. That' is true for you, too!

That means letting Dad and Dad's family worry about him. Do you have caller ID? Can you not take calls from this man?

Sorry about the bike -- I know how that feels. It makes you feel so mad and hopeless that there's all this meanness in the world.

Hang in there -- still praying for you!
Casey

Thank you, Casey and all. I'm concerned about Katie. Tomorrow she is off work and is going to a concert with at least one of her old friends who is an alcoholic drug user. I'm going to be praying for her to be strong or better yet, not to go at all as I have to hire and pay a babysitter in order for her to get to go at all.

The judge and the probation officer mean business. There are no more grace periods left for her. Why won't she grow up!!! Lately I've been more angry with her and frustrated with her than I can tell you.

Her children need her to be their mom, not me. I'm grandmom even though they feel like my own and I love them as my own.

The Dad makes me sick. I can't stand him for what he did and is now trying to act the martyr. His son is furious with him and hurt, so hurt.

My husband wants everyone out of his life but me and him. I informed him that as long as needed, I would be there for Dublin and Aaliyah. They need stability and comfort and care, attention and love and humor and fun, just like any other child and they deserve to have it!

I'm angry.

I would be angry too. You've been in a bad zone for quite some time.

Your daughter: you can't force her to be responsible and you can't make her take the right path. My daughter was in sad shape and the hub paid for her rehab and it wasn't cheap. Today she knows that if she starts drinking again, she will end up in rehab with homeless people because I would never let him pay for it again. She's been sober for over a year now and really works to stay that way. But, it's been her choice and it has to be that way with your daughter. I stopped enabling her. I know when she's trying to get me to do something to prove my love and I won't go there with her.

You have to take care of yourself tho. I can't imagine my hub telling me he didn't want my grandkids in his life. My ex, the abuser, was like that and it sure wasn't a difficult choice to make. I would have chosen a stray dog over him.

Sometimes, you just have to let go and let God. It's out of your hands anyway.

I feel defeated but maybe that's the same thing as letting go and letting God. My grandson, gd and I prayed yesterday that whoever took his bike would feel so bad about it and would be so troubled that they would return it. The little guy believes in the power of prayer.

Its when we feel the most angry and the most defeated yet still reach up and out to God that He comes through in his own way and in his own time.

I'm going to the doctor on my next day off which is Friday just to get things checked out. There are things that I can do and some things I have no control over. I just have to sort through the mess and find those things I DO have control over and handlie THOSE.

NL.
We always bought second hand bikes for our boys. Have you checked Ebay?

NL, hang in there. We're all rooting for you and your family.
For the bike, check out freecycle.com. I don't know if there's one in your area, but it started here in AZ. Members post items they want to get rid of, or items they want. The request is that you post something to give away before you request something. You would be amazed at the items people are willing to give away. We have gotten rid of busted up concrete to someone who hauled it away to use as landscape rocks! Anyway, check it out, it's a great resource.

Thanks for the tips Yonuh and Hannelore. I'll go on the freecycle.com website. I want Dublin to learn the value of his and others possessions. I give him $5 a week allowance and also post a list of chores I'm willing to pay for over and above the ones he is expected to do just because he lives there...

One of them is for every yard sized bag of leaves and debris he sacks up full and carries to the curb he gets $1. I want him to earn his bike back and to go pick it out himself and pay for it.

He's so angry and hurt right now. He's been playing with his soldier dolls and throwing them at each other and tearing arms off and the like. I acknowledged to him that its ok to feel angry and its ok to cry. I told him I love him with all my heart and we and mom will go through this together and will find time to have fun and it will eventually be alright.

I'm so tired and every now and then my chest tightens and hurts. My eyes burn and my mouth feels so dry. I'm sure its just stress. I'm trying to practice breathing and reading jokes and things like that.

The Guenia pig family is a great source of comfort to us. They are so entertaining to watch and care for. Their antics are funny and cute. The kids and all the kids in the neighborhood love them. We've given all 8 of them names and are teaching them tricks and to respond to certain words. "mama" means food is on the way. They all line up like little soldiers waiting for food and water.

Also we play Crash Bandecoot and video games, plant flowers, work in the yard, go for walks and just wrestle and act silly. Gotta do something...right?

Diane, thanks for your words of wisdom.
NL- sad to know the bike is gone. Glad to know you're finally going to the Dr. Please know that when we give up and give God a chance to work, he works wonders; as there is nothing impossible for him. I praise His name, for he will not let you handle more than you can bear. I'm praying for you!