I went thru my breast cancer pretty much alone, even tho' I'm married.
I had two lumpectomies, and then radiation.
When I told my husband I had breast cancer, he just stood and stared at me. I had to reach for him, and I hugged him.
I would work all day, go across the street from the hospital and have my radiation every day for 12 weeks.
No comments from my husband. None!!!
Please don't say he didn't know what to say, he just didn't care.
My oldest daughter was living in Vancouver at the time and was about to have my first Grandson.
Told the doc's they couldn't do anything to me until he was born.
I was told on my 50th BD that I had breast cancer, and he was due on my BD. He was born three days later.
That's what got me thru the breast cancer. My first Grandchild!
Then was told I was a breast cancer survivor, and the next day was told I had Melanoma.
Still no support from my husband. His comment was, "Just consider it as a new adventure."
I watched a co-worker go thru her husband dying from Melanoma on his back, exactly where they found mine.
Thank God both my dtrs. were living in town by then I had their support.
I handled it as not talking about it, just going on with what I always did before. Work, work, and work.
Now that I type all that out......I really don't know how I did it.
I am a survivor!!!! Like all the rest of us here!
Lynne

I would like to give all of you big hugs.
I'm so glad your here, to hug.
(((HUGS)))

Jackie, I've often heard of people volunteering to support cancer patients in some way after surviving cancer. You and your husband must offer so much hope at thist ime in your lives. What an inspiration.

Lynnie, cards and calls. They're such simple things to do. Why don't we send and make them more often?

Lynne, I am so grateful you had the loving support of your daughters. How old were they at the time?

Yes, Dotsie, cards were important. I would look at each one and think "this person took the time out of his/her day to go to the card store, take a look see, and pick out a card especially for me at this moment in time." I never take nothing for granted no more! L, L

That last sentence says it all, Lynnie. Can't take nothing for granted no more once you realize how short life can be.

Jackie......you are so right on about not taking anything for granted.
Dotsie....my oldest was 30 and the youngest was 27. Both girls were not living in Olympia when I was diagnosed with the breast cancer, but were here when I was diagnosed with the Melanoma.
When the doc's office called and said they wanted to see me(I worked across the parking lot from him at the hospital)I called my girl's and they met me there. I really needed them there!
After being told you have cancer once, it's so hard being told twice! And there are so many out there that have been told many times, and still survive!!!
Lynne

Lynne, I am sorry to hear that your husband could not respond with support to your cancer experiences. If not for your daughters and doctors, you must have felt so alone! I wish I could give you a hug. Love and Light, Lynn

I just talked to a very dear friend of mine who went through breast cancer about 3 years ago...the cancer is back...and I guess they said there is nothing they can do. (I didn't ask for details). She is going through chemo again - she is going to fight - she has 3 beautiful daughters 15, 13, 10...and a husband who is cold as ice.

She said the hardest thing isn't living or dieing, it's her husband.

If you feel like lifting her up in prayer, her name is Tina. She is a treasure. She is a woman of great faith.

I can't imagine going through this, let alone without the support of your husband. I know you ladies know what I mean.

:0(

Danita

Oh how I wish I could wave a wand and have this terrible, ugly disease wiped from the face of the earth. I'm so sorry Lynne to read all of this and I too hold you close to my heart. You are such a brave and dear woman!

Danita, I will pray for Tina and her family, and also for her husband's heart to melt so that he can see the great need in front of him and respond with love and tenderness. This just breaks my spirit into!

JJ

Lynne, I offer this as, I hope, comforting words to you:

My mother in law had breast cancer in her late fifties. In her late seventies she also was diagnosed with uterine cancer. She lived a happy, pain free life which was normal in every way until her death.

She was 87 when she passed away and it was not from cancer.

Cancer is not always an automatic death sentence.

[ February 18, 2006, 01:26 PM: Message edited by: ladybug ]