Andria and Jane,

Thank you ever so much for answering my post.

And Jane, thank you for telling me that this is a hard thing to do, I mean, "confronting the ugly voice." I thought I'd go in to that therapist and wham, it would all be gone. I think you are right. Maybe just talking about my whole experiences has triggered those ugly thoughts again.

It is so exhausting -- for me, at least -- to change those voices.

One of my biggest problems with the new therapist is that she can only see me twice a month. This isn't enough for me right now. Also, the other things too make me think she's not right for me.

Will be seeing Dr. Spear this Sat. He says he has the name of a good cognitive therapist. She's right here in Silver Spring. He wants to talk with her first. He doesn't think the one I have at church is a good match for me, at all.

I'm just hoping that this new lady takes my insurance and is taking new patients.

I am so disappointed in myself for this backslide. Hope it ends really fast.

Andria, I just couldn't go anywhere yesterday. I'm going to my regular Dr. today because I have spots on my tonsils. Maybe I'm actually sick and this is making me feel even more lazy. I usually just push myself, even if I'm running a temp. But I just couldn't do that yesterday and then the spots appeared this morning. We'll see.

Love you all,
Emily in Maryland, who is trying with good help and suggestions from the ladies on this board