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    BWS Stories - "If I Could Save Time In A Bottle"...Embracing Our Authentic Selves

    "If I Could Save Time In A Bottle"...Embracing Our Authentic Selves - Unconventional First Aid

    Unconventional First Aid

    Can you imagine why anyone in their right mind would jump into the toilet? Well, haven’t you ever done something that made perfect sense to you while those around you acted as if you had lost your mind? Sometimes you just need to get all the facts.

           When our son Ed was young, we frequently shared a vacation cabin with my husband’s family. This suited us because we could spend quality time with family, while
    sharing expenses and housekeeping duties. In 1969, we had plans to meet his family at Lake Winnipesauke in New Hampshire for a week of fishing. We arrived first and as Art and Ed unpacked, I started supper. Soon Dad’s favorite pot roast was in the oven and we were relaxing by the shore. When I left to check the roast, the rest of the family was overdue to arrive.

            Barefoot, I pulled open the oven door. But the shelf stuck and the hot drippings sloshed over onto my naked feet! The pain was incredible! I tried to remember my Red Cross First Aid training … something … ice or cold water … reducing temperature … flashed through my head. I leaped to the sink, tears streaming down my cheeks and turned on the cold water, but I couldn’t lift my feet high enough to get them under the kitchen faucet.  

            I scurried into the bathroom and managed to get one foot under the faucet. But the other one was killing me. What to do? The tub! I hopped to the tub, turned on the cold water and stuck the other foot under the running water. Still no good as I could only get one foot under the water at a time!

            I closed the drain imagining relief when I could put both feet under the cold water at once. But the tub was filling so very slowly. I glanced around desperately. Suddenly, there, right in front of my eyes, was an unbelievably beautiful pool of clean cold water. So … I jumped into the toilet.

        Aah ... thank Heavens, instant blessed relief! The tears dried on my cheeks and the pain gradually subsided as the water ran into the tub. Then I heard an unexpected noise. I opened my eyes just in time to see my father-in-law’s favorite plaid pants disappear from view. Oh no! The rest of the family had arrived and there I stood in the toilet. My face reddened. But then Dad’s refusal to acknowledge what he’d seen tickled me and I began to giggle which did not help. Now I was standing in the toilet giggling!

            In quick succession, every one of them walked by, peeked in, looked startled, snapped eyes front like Marines, and kept right on going. By the time Art, who at least
    shrugged and gave me a confused look, had silently followed the rest of the family, I was convulsed with laughter, still standing in the toilet. I couldn’t believe it; no one had said a word! How weird; talk about denial. I was laughing so hard I couldn’t move or speak.
    It wasn’t until my son, the comedian, appeared that anyone spoke. "Mom!" He cried. Don’t flush! We love you!" This only made me laugh harder.

            Then my wonderful little boy, who’d seen the spilled grease in the kitchen when he’d gone to turn off the water I’d left running, (No wonder the tub had been filling so
    slowly) realized why I was standing in the toilet.

            He turned off the tub faucet. "I think its deep enough now Mom," he said, helping me out of the toilet. We sat on the side of the tub, arms around each other, each of my feet, finally covered with the cool water and both of us laughed ‘til we cried. As the rest of the family trouped into the tiny bathroom … talk about togetherness, Eddie and I explained what had happened.

            The Wilson’s still talk about the time I jumped into the toilet, only now they brag about my intelligence. Why? Well, the Red Cross was right. The best first aid for burns is not butter, but cold water. I didn’t even get a blister. Jumping into the toilet was the smartest thing I could have done.

        So, the next time you see someone do something you think is totally wrong, incredibly weird, absolutely bonkers, just nuts, or simply crazy … get all the facts before you judge. And just in case, keep your toilet clean.

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