First of all, I've enjoyed sharing and second, I deeply appreciate those who had the guts to open up and talk about their own experiences.

If you have been reading this thread and see yourself here, please know that a woman never asks for abuse although there is a part of society that will try to make her believe this. Second, you don't deserve it...NO MATTER WHAT! I don't care what the abuser has told you or tried to convince you...you have done nothing to deserve to be abused. Third, reach out for help. Call your local shelter and even if you don't feel you are in danger physically, emotional abuse will destroy you from the inside-out and you can attend a support group that will give you your power back. Fourth, if you have children, understand that abuse will change their lives forever so it's about more than just you. You may feel that they need their father but not if he is an abuser. Abuse will define their future. Abuse is a deal-breaker. Fifth, if you think being abused makes you a holier woman, think again. It's unholy ground and not where you want to walk. God does not approve of abuse! Sixth, open up and tell someone but make that someone a person who can really help you, not just a sounding board. Venting does no good if change doesn't follow it. It can become a pattern. Seventh, know that you are loved even if you don't feel it or if the abuser tells you that you are unlovable. A lie. You are valuable because you draw a breath and are God's Creature. We all deserve to be loved but not the kind that an abuser gives. He may tell you that only he understands and knows you. Another lie.

Find your own truth. It's the truth you were given at birth and may just be buried. Do whatever it takes to find the woman you are. You'll like her and may find that you've never really met her, just like I did. I like me and you can like yourself as well. Just give another kind of life a chance.

If any of you want to discuss this further, we can always post in the domestic violence thread. Just don't be afraid because you won't be judged. If you want to go to my website and read, you WILL see yourself there if you are a victim and you'll know you aren't alone. There are 4 million people who are abused every year! www.eadv.net

Reach out and change your life.