Kathryn,
I want so desperately to tell you that you have nothing to fear, that everything will be just hunkey dorey...I cannot. I use to tell anyone who would listen (and did so proudly) that MY boys would NEVER join a service and fight in a war..that I could not, as a Mother live thru it. I simply couldn't and before that would happen, I would take them both to Canada. I am so ashamed to admit this. But I want you to know what changed my mind and how brave I think your son is...and you as well. I was reading the account of Christ death for the millionth time one day when suddenly the whole story took on a new meaning for me. God sent his son to die for us...Christ Mother watched her only son being crucified. I cried...and I said, "Oh Lord, if you can do this because you love me so much, how can I say I won't do the same thing for my fellow man, if my children CHOOSE to go?" From then on, I knew that if my children made the choice I would be devasted, torn, and so depressed you would have to peel me off the ground. BUT...I also knew that I would stand by them, support them, and help other people who were facing the same thing.

I edited a book this year called, "Women Write the War" by Bee Petersen...in it, women who have husbands, sons, daughters, boyfriends, etc...tell their stories. It is powerful, and mirrors the heartbreak you are experiencing right now. I would be happy to send you my copy to read if you would want to? I would only asked that you return it once you are done.

As I said, I want so much to help, but I am not faced with it. I have both of my boys here at home, safe and sound. So how can I comfort you when you do not? I can only tell you that I'm here, we all care deeply about you and your son, and all you have to do is say the word and we're here to offer whatever support we can. You are much loved. And so is your son. It would be my honor to write to him if you/he would let me. And to write anyone else's son/daughter/husband that is in the service now. Please tell him he has my heartfelt thanks for being so brave and chosing to protect me and everyone else in this country.

Your friend,

JJ