Sorry none of your friend's final wishes were carried out, Jabber.

They should have been, especially if she had spelled them out in a valid will. Too bad no one in her family was able to go to bat for the concept of respecting her wishes.

But for the most part, it's been my experience that when wishes are known, either in an official will, or in some sort of validated document -- even if it is a videotape -- I believe it is the executor's job to assure that the deceased's final wishes are respected.
Boomer in Chief of Boomer Women Speak and the National Association of Baby Boomer Women.