Some more great advise as usual Sue. Picturing the first sensation I felt on my feet is kind a funny scenario. It was when I was about 5, and we were on one of our summer vacations in Rhodes. My aunt took my brother and myself to the beach. I remember not wanting sand in my shoes so I took them off. What happened next was a big surprise to me! I didn't realize how bloody hot the sand would be, next thing I knew I was running like crazy probably getting sand on all the sunbathers as I passed them by. I didn't care, I was making a bee line to the water, which seemed to take forever to get there. Oh but once I did, it was heavenly. I even think this may have been my first experience with feeling euphoric. Thank God I had the experience with walking on sand in the later part of the day when it was sunset. Because I discovered the sand felt therapeutic and sensational when it was cooler.

I had been thinking about the benefits of memoirs. I get really irritated when someone will talk about how they overcame something or how they became successful. Yet they do not go into detail with how they reached that point. So when the reader is trying to achieve anything, thinking it's easy, the reader could get discouraged and think there is something definitely wrong with them.

An example is how I got out of a two year deep depression. Usually, you will hear something like this:

I went through a depression for two years and suddenly it dawned on me to do something to get out of the house and meet people. I applied for a job and they hired me. I went to work my first day and I have been very happy since.

A reader will look at that scenario and go, wow, maybe that is what I could do too. They go and they applied for a job and they never get a call, or an interview. They become more depressed and sink deeper.

The two year depression was triggered by something I had done that almost tore my family apart. I was living the shame and the guilt. I was so afraid to even lift a finger and all I wanted to do was sleep most of the time. It got to the point where I was almost agoraphobic. I knew what I had to do, but I was too afraid of failure. It took a death of a good friend to get me to snap out of it and even that was a slow process. I had gone to Northern VA to see her when she was in her death bed. I had run into some old friends of mine and I really had missed the life I had before. This friend of mine had a great fulfilling life. I didn't want to die one day wasting away like a lump on a log.

So I forced myself to look for a job in several places. I forced myself to fill out the applications. I had so much anxiety, and what ifs. Finally, I just had to tell myself, I am no worse off than I am now. I have nothing to lose.

On the day of my interview for the job I am currently at right now. I kept telling myself, I will go in there and be myself and answer some the questions. If they do not hire me, at least I know I've made a start and I'll try again. I have nothing to lose. This was one of my best interviews. While I was dressed decent, I was not dressed in a stuffy manner. I wore the jewelry I would normally wear and I sat the way I normally did. I figured, it's only fair that the employer sees what she/he will get. I said as much when I interviewed with the manager. He said, you seem so relaxed and I appreciate it. How do you do it? I said it was best to let him see me as I am and that way there will be no disappointments later on when he hired me. To this day, he still talks about the interview.

Anyway, that is the gist of what I went through. I believe a reader should see the downside and the difficult steps it took to get out of ones situation. Now my turn to ask...Am I making sense?

Sorry I haven't posted for the past week. I am facing some challenges lately. However, do not despair! This could be another memoir in the making!!!

Cheers,
Cathi