Hi all,
Again thank you for your comments. I love to hear all of them.
As I have written, I have been back and forth about moving ahead with my separate life but feeling ambivalence about it. My husband has not been willing to do anythng legal but seems not to be doing anything different to make things better either and it has been a year and a half of living apart. I find that the more contact I have with him and my other house (which he still lives in, unfinished) the worse it is for me - bad moods, unhappiness, etc. I have to trust my feelings and know they are there for a reason, mainly 30+ years of alot of ups and downs. When I am not in contact with him and am on my own, I seem to be happier. I read a quote recently that spoke to me. Can't remember it exactly but it was something like "Why not laugh now and forget rather than remember and feel sad" I think right now is all we have and there really is no room for regrets if we want to live our lives to the fullest.
So as you say Dotsie, baby steps. I am taking them every day, sometimes I teeter backwards, but keep trying to move forward. Thankyou!