i have to wonder if that "unclaimed youth" is all it's cracked up to be -- i mean -- would you REALLY want to be a youth again ??????

our younger times are for screwing up -- doing things that make you just CRINGE when you get older -- making decisions that you wonder how you survived to look back at them --

if you can look in the mirror and say -- i'm okay -- i made a difference in someone else's life -- i survived -- then what else is it all about ???????

it IS a lifestyle -- but not always one that's easy to figure out how to give up -- i had to let go of that youth to finally find the strength to grow up --

i was the loser -- the one that caused all the pain -- the one who lied and cheated and tried to destroy everything that was good and decent -- the one who hurt my family

and there won't be one day in my life that i won't remember it all -- thank GOD for my husband's decision to love me anyway -- to keep my children from hating me -- to give me the time to find a way back ------

wouldn't it be nice if life came with instructions