We also have to remember the hormonal activity. KAte, I think you should mention your moodiness to your gyn. Maybe she can do a blood test to check your estrogen level.

Oh my gosh! I am sitting here crying as I type this. Talk about a thread stiking a chord. I hate to admit it, but I've felt really lonely the last few years. Here I am constantly surrounded by the most wonderful teams of doctors and a husband who has supported me through a really rough time, and yet, when I read Chatty's words, I just welled up and erupted in absolute recognition. I wrote in the Illness thread about all the physical stuff that hasn't killed me, but I swear, sometimes, it seems like it will be the loneliness that does me in. Like so many others, I am trying to take baby steps but they are limited by my medical issues right now, which is why I am so grateful for the internet. It is so good not to feel alone. Thank you to each and every one of you, and here's to all of us finding our purpose and to the support we can find here while we make our journeys.

I've been thinking that while the Internet keeps us connected, it can also serve to keep us home and not venturing out to meet new people. My daughter has been nagging me to get out, make new friends and to not spend so much time on the computer. She knows I'm slightly depressed and lonely but it's self-inflicted. Even when my husband comes home, I feel lonely so it's an internal problem, not him.

I feel like I know all of you personally and I always look forward to your messages here. I was teary all day yesterday thinking about the loneliness so many of us experience.

Fiftyandfine, I'm so glad you find comfort here with your sisters, who care deeply for you and who can relate all too painfully well to your loneliness.

When I first stumbled onto this site, I was literally dying, withering away from a terrible aloneness, compounded by debilitating chronic fatigue and anxiety which made it almost impossible for me to venture outside. This site most definitely saved my life and sanity. Perhaps even my marriage.

I'm still not physically up to going out some days, but at least now, I'm MENTALLY able to go out more, and that's a huge step in the right direction. My compassionate, patient sisters here have helped me to heal and grow to the point where anxiety does not have control over me as it did months ago.

Hearing about others here suffering from loneliness also makes me weep in empathetic recognition of that pain. I carry all of us in heartfelt prayer every day that we will make a good dent in that loneliness by being here for each other.

Katebcca, Here's another lonely one. My work is also lonely. I'm an office product manufacturer's rep and work from home. I don't have co-workers.......well, except for Daisy, and she is a good friend, but she doesn't say much. I don't even talk much on the phone anymore because everything is done by email! Of course there is more to it than that, but I don't want to write a book here.

Last week I read Suzzane Somers book and I discovered how our hormones could affect us mentally and emotionally. I knew it, but I guess I hadn't accepted it for myself. Could a hormone imbalance cause loneliness? I think it could. Oh, sure, we all have had disappointments, struggles, and hardship, but what keeps us (me) from doing what we need to do to prevent it?

In my past I've done many things to combat loneliness, such as volunteering at a shelter, at the local theatre, I participated in various Christian-based studies, ministries, etc. And, don't forget dating! Of course my motive wasn't always to combat loneliness, because at the time I didn't realize I was.

Katebcca, although I feel that you should definitely get those paints out, the thing I believe will combat your loneliness is to be with other people - you need people! My town has an organization that supports local artists, maybe your could find something like that.

The bottom line is that we have to make the effort to participate in life and no one can do it for us. Now I just have to find a way to take my own advice.

Daisygirl

Thanks Daisygirl, I totally agree. Painting is a great outlet but it is also something you do alone. I have checked out some art groups and am thinking of taking a few courses just to get out there. I work alone and don't talk to very many people. Email is usually the way I connect with clients too. But, I rarely use the computer at home, other than to check out this site and respond to others. It is a great outlet too as long as you mix it up with getting out there. I seem to have kicked the lonely habit for now. Baby steps, Oh it will come back. Something to think about... loneliness may be a message to us that we have to make changes in our life. Sometimes we get too comfortable staying home and isolated and then suddenly out of nowhere it hits us....why am I so lonely. We all need people and this site is wonderful and supportive but we need to spend time in person with people too. Sometimes I forget that. I do owe my kicking the lonely habit this week to you wonderful ladies. I hope by talking about it all of us who are feeling lonely will step out of our comfort zone this week and do something with others. I will pray for each and every one of you tonight that you will beat it if only until the next time. Good night.
Kate

I'm wondering if it would help to chart the lonely feelings. I have a gut feeling it's hormonal. What do others think?

For the women who use vitamin and herbal supplements, do you know what might help these feelings?

I believe it's important to get out and be with other people. While I love these forums and am grateful they are here, I still believe we need lots of interaction with others in the real world.

Maybe we should list what we do when we are out and about. This may give others some ideas. What do you think?

I like to go to the book store and see what's out there. Grab a cup of coffee and sit in the little cafe and look through a book I might buy.

And of course, I like to go to my favorite store and check out what shoes have arrived. Sometimes, I grab something for lunch and go to the boutique where my daughter works and share it with her.

I also love to find a new neighborhood and walk through the model homes. I get a lot of great ideas on decorating and style.

My favorite is to have a girls night at my house with a theme and we each contribute a dish toward the theme. It's always so much fun.

Dianne, you have such great ideas there. I don't get myself out enough. Partly because of the fatigue and anxiety, but partly because I just can't come up with fresh ideas that don't cost money, need a car or are enjoyable doing alone. I really like the idea of finding a new neighborhood and walking through model homes. I surely can't be tempted to buy a new house! (If I go browse through a book store or music store, I don't have enough willpower to come home without 2-3 books or CD's!)