Will those who are already on the other side of menopause share what we (the ones going through it) have to look forward to?

My period began every month like clockwork for what seemed like a thousand years. Started at age 11 and ended with little fuss on May 8th. 1990. Never came, ever again. I was 50 then. I breezed through Menopause unscaled, no hot flashes, no mood swings, nothing. I am 64 now and feel I am well over the change. I am happy to say the only irritating part is growing those silly chin hairs. Also ladies you never have to worry about getting pregnant, its called by some Freedom Riding...Your weight can be a little easier to gain and harder to lose but good news is you can compensate for that. I have found the entire process enlightning and liberating. You can to because alot of it is in our heads. Be happy and embrace these changes the Lord has sent to us. I never took hormones ( my personal chaice) as everything I read and my mothers advice was they aren't natural and menopause is a natural experience.
I hope you can all think of yourselves as fortunate to have come this far and continue to enjoy the journey in peace and amazement...

I had a very different experinece then Chatty. I do envy her, as my Dr said I went through 3 years of menopause hell. I took hormones but was very depressed and had severe emotional problems, mood swings, weight gain, High blood pressure, and heart arrythmia problems. Due to all those things happening, I was fired from my job, went through a winter of depression, another job from Hell, and another firing. Another blow to my ego.

Now, through it all, I am stronger, recognize that I may always take medicine for a chemical imbalance in my body, and that I have finally come through it. After two cancer scares and finally on the other side, I can say I am glad that it is over. Feeling much better now, no one that I talk to on the phone in my Customer Service work ever guess that I am nearing 55 with (as of tomorrow) 10 grandchildren and another one due in July.

I feel the best then I have in years, and am looking forward to a new life, full of new things, hightlights, a second career as a writer and thankful that I am here as suicide was a constant thought in my head. I have a Dr. that worked with me for over a year and a half to get my medications to the point that I feel I am a happy, productive human being that is glad to be alive. I didn't have anyone to talk to about this menopause business, as my Mother was gone, and every woman in my family has had a hysterectomy and never gone through the pangs of menopause. I feel good now, and except that it is very hard to lose any weight, I never felt better! Take hope there is life after menopause.

Love to you all,

Sherri

PS, It is so much fun being a grandmother, that I wished I had grandchildren first!! LOL

I started to have major flooding and flashes, so went in and had several surgeries. Finally last summer I had the big "H". What a great thing it is to have all of that behind me! I do still need the hormones to be comfortable, but on my own I decided to cut back to every other day, and that pretty much works. I also had read that you have so much more energy when you're finally "there". I kept waiting for the energy, but take heart! It does come! I do feel great, strong, energetic and ready for most anything! The problem is the road getting here is long and rough, but hang in there, it's worth it!

How long after the big h did the energy come?

The mood swings are interesting, hot flashes like a power surge then freezing at times. The doctors didn't prescribe any medicine so I've just gone with the flow. At least when my face turns red its not blushing anymore.
Love not having to worry about the periods and cramps.
Maggie

I'm still looking for fresh meat. Nothing is scared and I'm thinking of eating my young. Any questions?

Dotsie,

Is the pill working for you? Did you start it because of heavy bleeding?

My past two periods, have been ghastly. At work, I bled through clothes two days in a row. And I am near a bathroom!!!

Last period, I was flying and religiously went to the bathroom every hour to change and Foosh! Sitting in my seat, I flooded through my pants (fortunatley black) and stained the airplane seat.

Dreading this go round.

Lynn

Lynn, I've heard similar horror stories.

I went on because they were lasting forever! I alos felt on edge and had bad cramps. I finally decided it was half the month that I was worrying or wrapped up with the problem. That's half my life and I decided the heck with this.

My sister who has been on the pill has had none of this. I spoke with my gyn and went for it and I am so GLAD I did. I don't like taking any medication, but my quality of life is so much better. I don't have to think about when it's coming or how long it's stickin' around, no longer have the tense feelings or anxious moments. I'm loving it! I hope this helps!

Last weekend Dave and I met friends in Jonesborough, TN. They live in SC, we live in VA and TN is halfway for both of us so, every so often, we meet for lunch. My girlfriend asked me about menopause and I told her things were going all right. I can't take the heat but don't know if that's due to sun stroke 2 years ago (twice in one summer) or menopause. She can't take the heat either and she's never had sun stroke. She told me that women who actually go through menopause are 7% of the entire female population of "that age" in the USA. I know when I started asking women friends about symptons, etc. most of them will never have symptons because they have had "the operation".

I did go to an ob/gyn who wanted to quoteandIkidyounot "yank the plumbing because at your age it's not like you're going to have children". If he hadn't had his hand in me, I'd have kicked him in the whereever I could have reached from that position.

I told him I'd really rather not chance the statistics on HRT and breast cancer so would keep my plumbing, thankyouverymuch. He then said, "when the hot flashes get bad enough, you'll crawl back to me and beg for drugs". I thought if the hot flashes get *that* bad I'll crawl back to you and shoot your sorry arse and then hope for an all female jury.

All that to say, it's not been terrible and I've rather enjoyed this phase of my life. The urge to kill abates as time goes on and, I'm hopeful, will go away entirely. Or else, maybe the people will...either will be okay. gggg!

Hey Thist Sis...if it gets bad enough, just go crawling back and de-worm him and vacinate him! That ought to do it, eh?

JJ

You're on the right track Thistle with what you said about enjoying this stage of your life and thats half the battle. Hot is hot no matter the cause and you'll notice its a stupid man trying to cut you up or scare you about needing drugs. I personally like the Queens idea. Snip and plunge, bet that would change his one sided attitude. This is the best part of your life, right now and it'll only get better. If I weren't such a lady I might say something, awh F_ _ K the A_ _Hole. Women rule.....

What I wanted to say was, "you're on your second wife and second family. Looks to me like you won't be needing your plumbing either so why not cut it? And, I'll help" -evil grin-

He's a jerk, born thataway and will die thataway. A friend of mine almost died 3 months ago because he wouldn't do the necessary surgery on her because she didn't have insurance. She's needed this surgery since last autumn and he kept putting her off until she ended up in the emergency room. She had tumors the size of grapefruit and endometreiosis -which is probably spelled wrong- wrapped around her bowels, lower intestines, etc.

The worst thing about living in a rural area is the lack of competent health care professionals and the lack of female health care professionals as in doctors. There aren't any. Another friend goes back to Richmond, a 6 hour drive, every year for her annual exams. She has a GP here for "minor" health problems. I've been seriously considering going back to Richmond to my former female ob/gyn who was/is ABSOLUTELY WONDERFUL!

And no, Chatty, it's enough he's gotten two woemn to do that for him. I'll not stoop to be the third! -evil grin- Heck, I'm not even going back to him with money in hand!

Off the subject kinda sorta, but a kazillion years ago when I needed to see a obgyn doc, my Mom (who lives 60 miles west of here) told me about one in my hometown and highly recommended him. Without thinking to ask why she did recommend him, I went to see him for a checkup and pap smear...I found out from her afterwards that he was an old boyfriend of hers...talk about giving me the hibbee jeebies...ewwwww...somehow it just didn't seem proper. I never could look him in the face again...and he never got to look at me any place else either.

When I was in the hospital gearing up to deliver my son I caught a glimpse of a friend who was doing his residency at the time.

Our families are friends and I've been at several social events with him.

I was shaking in my foam slippers.

I told Ross that there was NO WAY he was getting near me.

Talk about creepy.

He came over to visit us and I didn't hear a word he said. All I could think was...if he thinks he's examining me, he's lost it and I'm outta here.

After he walked away Ross told me someone else was coming over to do the exam.

I was such a basket case I didn't even hear him say that!

I've seen him since and still turn red just thinking about it.

Don't you think it's odd that a hometown boy does his residency at the local hospital...in the obstetrics section?

SPEW ALERT!!!!! OMIGHOSH Queenie, that was FUNNY!!! Your mom couldn't have gotten you any better if she'd tried setting you up! How funny although I'm sure you didn't start laughing right away.

Dots- good question but not sure I want to know the answer.

I'm with whoever said male ob/gyn's give me the creeps.

That is a big 10-4 on the giving us the creeps thing! One time when mine was giving me an exam, I said "let me know when you reach China." I mean come on people!

JJ

You guys are too funny!

Sandra... THAT doctor is a jerk and you should have told him that his 'besdie manner' left a lot to be desired.
What exactly was his reason for becoming a doctor, the paycheck and prestige or did he have a heart way back then that genuinely wanted to administer healing to people? I think some people just go forging on ahead (like perfect boobs)(well... not like real boobs) just because someone hasn't stopped them short and demanded that they regroup and think about what they're saying and how it's perceived. Hmmm... you should call his office. Better yet, give us all his number and we'll call his office and give him some pointers.....in fact, find his home phone number and we can all call and hang up a zillion times.....oh and his address too, we can send him notes....yeah......do that.

Back on the subject though... I think I may be done with my periods although I woke up with cramps the other night and thought I'd have a surprise but nope. It's just SO typical... if I have my periods, my daughter uses all the pads and I never can find any, now that I have a huge pack from the last time I got them at WalMart, I haven't had a period in almost six months. Isn't that always the way?
I think I've had only one or two hot spells... but summer is coming so I'm not exactly looking forward to it. But who knows, I may be done. And how would I notice mood swings? My life has been so nutty that a simple mood swing would be an improvement.

But I don't want chin hairs, okay?

Kate

Hey Kate - now you need horses! Those pads are the *very thing* to use on wounds -grin-. Most rescue folks carry them in their bags, along with surgical tape, etc. so they will have a lightweight wound care kit.

Every year, we'll have different folks that need to be rescued from the mountains...some children that wander away, some hunters that get lost, etc. The rescuerers are told to *always* carry menstrual pads and the "Always" pads are good...more absorbent and lightweight.

I keep pads down at the barn for wraps, etc.

Yeah, the doc was/is a real jerk. I think he likes the money. I saw a new BMW roadster in his driveway the other day.

Oh...that reminds me...you want CREEPY???

This ob/gyn is married to a woman who has a brother who has a wife...got that?

The sis-in-law/husband are school teachers and they don't make a lot of money (according to them...I mean, I think $60,000 a year is good money or am I wrong?)

Anway, when the sis-in-law got pregnant, she goes to her bro-in-law ob/gyn because he won't charge her doc fees and he gets a reduction at the hospital.

YUCK! Does anyone else think that's **strange**?

Waita second...... I don't think I 'got it'.

"This ob/gyn is married to a woman who has a brother who has a wife...got that?" WHA?

No. I didn't get it....'splain it again Rickee.

If he's a guy and his wife is a woman, and she has a brother who is married to a woman wife....where is that weird? or is someone not the right sex? Or is it just weird because the brother in law, the doctor, was her doctor.......and HELLO, right now I'd love $60,000 a year. That would suit me just fine. I'd have money to give away.

So .... try it again.

Kate

Is it just me or did that have all the makings of a great "who's on first" joke?

Kate

okay, there's gonna be a lot of fun with this one today...teehee...

try...the ob/gyn brother-in-law's wife...

maybe?

what the heck, leave it...if you change it, then we wouldn't have all this fun, right?

The doctor delivered his sister-in-law's two children. Dr. John was married to Jane who had a brother, Tom, who's wife, Sue, went to her brother-in-law, Dr. John as her ob doc.

shudder! that's a LOT too close for my comfort level!

Anyway, you got the important part...yep! $60K a year is nice money. I'd rather pay my ob/gyn and never see him outside the office. It beats looking at look at him over the Thanksgiving turkey .

Yeah...who's on first? Great comparison! Wish I'd been that clever not by accident.

*sigh* Okay... I got it...........but it was more fun when I didn't... so back to the $60,000...now that's not what the doc makes, right because if it is, he's not doing very well....and the deal with the doctor being the brother in law....well that might be weird but only if ..... .. well only if.... ... well I just don't know what would be weirder...if you ......No! Okay, I know.....it would be really weird if you got married and then you met your brother-in-law and thought "hey baby, he's cute" and then decided to have him as your ob/gyn......but if he was already your ob/gyn and then you just happened to meet his brother at some point and totally unaware, got married...then it would......nope........then it would still be like having your brother-in-law look under your dress...... ... so let's see how can I make this work?....Well.....it's simple. She has to find a woman doctor. Yeah..... that's my answer.

Kate

Dots,
Your post about your friend the obgyn resident in labor and delivery reminded me of when my daughter was born.

I was a nineteen yr. old delivery room nurse in a small town. When I went into labor I called in sick and they had to call in my friend who was also a nurse to assist with the delivery. I worked with my obgyn doc in the delivery room every day, but by the time I went into labor, I was past being embarrassed when he was on the wrong end of me.

On he delivery table, I could see my co-workers, most of whom I supervised, all gathered around looking at me from the wrong end.

It was weird. Also, I knew all the jokes that went around. But we all survived.
smile

[ June 12, 2004, 04:13 PM: Message edited by: smilinize ]

Boy, I sure would hate to be staring down at the face of a co-worker I had made mad that day...eeek!

Okay, so...who's on second?

Hey JJ,
I just tried to smile. --- On both ends.
smile

well, as many of you know, I kinda plunged straight into menopause thanks to chemo in 1998. Most women on my meds got horrible hot flashes. I got none. No mood swings either. What I got, however, was my once-washboard abs went into sludge, and I do mean SLUDGE. I exercise regularly and eat very well but it doesn't help. Plus about 10 lbs. weight gain.

The best part was after an FSH (follicle stimulating hormone? I think...) test, which said I was totally irrevocably in menopause. I went home and finally threw out all that old horrible underwear that I saved for my periods. Okay ladies, I KNOW y'all have (or had) the stuff -- that ratty embarrassing underwear practically hanging from a string, which is "period underwear" cuz if you bleed all over it YOU DON'T CARE, and if you bleed a lot, you can trash it with no regrets. Well, I tossed it all and bought a bunch of nice new ones!

Meredith, good thing my mother isn't reading this thread. She's the one who always asked if we had on clean underwear in case we ended up in the ER. Now that I rethink that, it's so odd, but I guess she meant well.

My menopause began around 46. There was bleeding and some discomfort and then I had to have a partial D&C. When I returned to Ohio the following year I underwent a full D&C.

The period of 'night-sweats' and sleeplessness did last for awhile---3-4 years and then it was much better.

To get through the difficult times I prayed a lot, had a supportive husband, took extra vitamins, exercised a lot and kept busy with writing and school.

I can honestly say that once I got through it, I felt a freedom I hadn't felt in years. No more periods, pain, worrying about pregnancy and my sexual life was 'kicked up' a notch.

My best advice would be try and stay as 'cool' as you can, keep moderately busy and understand that 'this too shall pass.'

I don't know where I am in this process. My periods stopped a few months ago, not sure when but it's been a long time, like maybe 4 months.

Moods? Who can tell. My job is fairly high stress so it's hard to tell when I get irritated if it's my "mood" or because people are just ridiculous.

But my hair is getting thin, my waist is thick...and my body just does NOT want to give up the pounds. So how do you tell if you've successfully "reached the other side." - wait for a year to see that you haven't killed anyone?

Kate

I heard somewhere that when you haven't menstruated for a full year you're on the other side.

Well wouldn't you just know it... along the lines of picking up a great magazine while waiting in a doctor's office, you get called in; getting up to the front of the grocery check-out line, you forgot the bread; right up to the ice cream counter, they run out of pistachio; just when you think you're (I'm) having no more periods.....here it is.

Sign me Krampy,Achey and evidently NotDone

BONE SUPPORT
Six Vital Nutrients for Bone Health

Yes, we need calcium. But without these other bone builders, too much calcium can cause brittle bones, joint pain and can even lead to a heart attack. These 6 vital nutrients not only STOP bone loss; they help build stronger, more flexible bones.

This study/article was developed and written after years of research by women doctors for Womans Unique Nutritional Needs. The 6 nutrients for stronger bones are:

Vitamin D3 (as cholecalciferol) 200 IU

Vitamin K1 (as phytonadione) 300 mcg

Calcium (as calcium citrate milate) 150 mg

Magnesium (as magnesium glycinate amino acid chelate) 150 mg

Boron ( as boron aspartate-citrate) 1 mg

Silicon ( as orthosilicic acid) 5 mg

Now you could try and take all 6 but getting the dosage correct isn't easy so;

Woman's Preferred
P.O.Box 467939
Atlanta, Georgia 31146-739

has the ingredients in capsule form for $22.45. I have mine auto shipped each month, no S&H.
Phone number is 1-800-728-2288

Those of you with brittle bone worries should be taking this. They carry alot of Nutritional Need items and I'm sure a catalog would be available.

You can have a blood test to determine for sure if you've hit menopause. I started having hit and miss periods when I was 43. A blood test said I was perimenopausal. By 46, the blood test showed I was menopausal.

Not good to hit it so young with all the health side affects. They did a bone scan on me and found I'd lost some bone density in my spine. So for about 6 months I've been taking Actonel. It's too early to run another bone scan to see if the Actonel is building my bones back up like it's suppose to but I've only heard good things about this medication. I also take a calcium supplement with vitamin D.

Chatty, agate, and dj, I marvel at your knowledge. I definitely need to talk to my doctor about all this.

This could be a dumb question, but who do you think knows more, GYN or GP?

Dotsie, I think it depends totally on the doctor. Ask questions thats really all you can do.