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#197648 - 01/13/10 07:02 PM For the good of others
Dotsie Offline
Founder

Registered: 07/09/08
Posts: 23647
Loc: Maryland
This seems to be a mantra that is sinking deep within me, though I don't know that I do enough to live up to this.

I thought it might be fun for us to begin sharing what we do for the good of others so we can learn from one another soem of the neat ways to go about this.

Anyone want to join me?

I'll begin, and I will share that this is not a way to brag about what we do. It's simply a way to make us think about what we're doing, and perhaps cause us to do more for others. It's also a way for us to see what others are doing for others.

While visiting my FIL today, I chatted with another visitor who said she was going through a lot of changes. She looked sad. I got a feeling something very sad is going on in her life that is above and beyond the person she visits who has ALzheimer's. When finished talking, I told her I'd keep her in my prayers, and she really lit up and thanked me.

Not a big deal, but it felt right.

Last night I made dinner for my committee meeting. I really like doing this because several of them are young and appreciate a good meal. The others cook all the time and appreciate a break. And two others have wives who cook for them all the time, but love to eat. They are so gracious, but they have to remember that I used to cook big meals all the time when the kids were young and had friends coming and going. Now I don't do it quite so much, and it's something I enjoy.

How about anyone else?


Edited by Dotsie (01/13/10 07:04 PM)
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#197661 - 01/13/10 10:53 PM Re: For the good of others [Re: Dotsie]
yonuh Offline
Member

Registered: 06/14/06
Posts: 2447
Loc: Arizona
I smile and greet everyone I see wherever I go, and express an interest in them as people. I listen to what people have to say, really listen, not just nod and make appropriate noises. And I never give advice unless I'm asked (I often have to bite my tongue on this one, but I'm getting better!)
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#197808 - 01/14/10 01:49 PM Re: For the good of others [Re: yonuh]
chatty lady Offline
Writer

Registered: 02/24/04
Posts: 20267
Loc: Nevada
Bringing this back...
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Take a peek at my BLOG:

http://charleen-micheles.blogspot.com/


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#197809 - 01/14/10 01:50 PM Re: For the good of others [Re: yonuh]
Dotsie Offline
Founder

Registered: 07/09/08
Posts: 23647
Loc: Maryland
yonuh, thanks for sharing. I especially like the piece about giving advice. I need to listen to that. Also, listening is a dying art since everyone's so busy.
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#197816 - 01/14/10 03:06 PM Re: For the good of others [Re: Dotsie]
jawjaw Offline
Da Queen

Registered: 07/02/03
Posts: 12025
Loc: Alabama
Here's the thing. We do these things because it makes US feel good...and the results is that we make others feel good as well. How can this be wrong even though we are performing these acts of kindness to get the "warm fuzzy." Now I'm not saying this is our motivation (in our minds) but isn't it?

I try to forgive. It is not always easy and especially when there are those around me who push the right buttons. Then...I realize something. They are my buttons, not theirs...so they can push all day and it is my reaction to the pushing that gets the REaction.

So first I have to forgive ME.

Listening, forgiving, and living. These are all great gifts to give ourselves as well as others.

Just my op

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#197817 - 01/14/10 03:10 PM Re: For the good of others [Re: jawjaw]
Dotsie Offline
Founder

Registered: 07/09/08
Posts: 23647
Loc: Maryland
Hmmm, not sure that's why I do things for the good of others. Like when I told my friend I'd pray for her. I didn't do it because it makes me feel good. I did it because I felt like she needed it, and I could easily pray for her.
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#197819 - 01/14/10 03:19 PM Re: For the good of others [Re: Dotsie]
jawjaw Offline
Da Queen

Registered: 07/02/03
Posts: 12025
Loc: Alabama
But you said "it felt right." Isn't that a good feeling to have?

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#197867 - 01/14/10 11:02 PM Re: For the good of others [Re: jawjaw]
chatty lady Offline
Writer

Registered: 02/24/04
Posts: 20267
Loc: Nevada
In my own case, I do what I do because it may help someone else but my own feeling don't really come into it. I will say it feels good to help someone who might otherwise be ignored. Does that make any sense?
_________________________
Take a peek at my BLOG:

http://charleen-micheles.blogspot.com/


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#197882 - 01/15/10 02:06 AM Re: For the good of others [Re: chatty lady]
jawjaw Offline
Da Queen

Registered: 07/02/03
Posts: 12025
Loc: Alabama
It feels good? Would you do it if it felt bad? Or wrong?

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#197901 - 01/15/10 03:20 PM Re: For the good of others [Re: jawjaw]
Dotsie Offline
Founder

Registered: 07/09/08
Posts: 23647
Loc: Maryland
My niece had a baby last weekend. Hooray. Instead of sending them flowers from the florist, I'm getting pink tulips from Trader Joe's and a bunch of fresh, fun foods, and will feel like I'm getting more for my money.

Took dinner to Dad last night.

Boy, I really am about the food, aren't I? No wonder I can't lose weight. I guess I like to feed people, and myself.
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Founder Emeritus of Boomer Women Speak and the National Association of Baby Boomer Women.
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