Dotsie, I was going to say what Meredith just said: you never lose God. Even in the cacaphony of life (phones, buzzers, bells, and whistles) I envision you in peace. You have the kind of peace people yearn for: young adults living their lives and pursuing their dreams, a household free of drugs, alcohol, and poverty, the normalcy of a maturing body, wrapped up in service to women, and God, the energy of a healthy human Being, and I can't see that you "lose it totally" because you have mental health, psychological balance, and constant strong loving support. I hope I don't sound like I am lecturing or that I am discounting what you are saying. I am just seeing that even when you feel like you are losing it, you do have peace, Although your world is all a twitter with sounds that drown the birds, they are just different sounds of lives being lived. And for that, what is there to forgive? Have you not chosen a household, husband, and children over the convent? L, PL xxoo P.S. PMS or peri menopause can aggravate the sound of annoying sounds. P.S. I came back to add that I admire you so very much Dotsie. You ooze vitality with just a hint of vulnerability. I can't even say all the ways I admire you. Peace, sister.

Do you think God as our Father allows up to divert much as we may let a child risk take in order to gain experience (Like on a swing or paddle in the sea) so by being aware we have moved sideways Dotsie...we can devote again.It is a habit to attend church where devotions are followed.By making it a habit to return each morning I see it as renewal of faith.
We live in busy times doing what we have to do .Last thing I do at night is give thanks for that day.
Mountain ash

Dotsie, I understand fairly well what you mean about the peaceful state one gains in prayerful contemplation and the distractions from it caused by temporal responsibilities. I, too, struggle with the challenge to maintain the unfathomable peace I obtain from retreats, daily prayers and especially when sitting in adoration of the Blessed Sacrament. How I envy those whose vocation in life is spent in monastic prayer. And, as one does not live a cloistered life, it is a daunting challenge when one yearns to find a sanctuary within oneself, in the midst of din, where one can be in peaceful communion with Jesus. But, as He is present everywhere, we can keep in touch with the peace obtained in the silence of prayerful contemplation through the movement of life which we personally experience from within in our thoughts, plans, feelings, aspirations and instincts we face daily. As we wish others peace, we continue to retain it.

This was a line I read in my morning meditation on joy:

Joy becomes a Hallelujah in the choir loft of our mind. (Barbara Johnson)

Throughout the activities of the morning, this line has been playing over and over in my mind, intertwined with a quiet-but-exultant Hallelujah chorus from Handel's Messiah. No matter where we went, or what we were doing, I could hear that Hallelujah above all of the other noises around me. Sanctuary within. We carry it everywhere we go; as long as we keep our eyes and ears of faith open, we maintain that "posture of prayer" deep within us even as we become immersed in the hectic pace of the day.

Dotsie, just a reflection...everything you describe in your initial post is what I perceive as an "abundant life". You mention that sometimes you feel like you're losing touch with God in the hectic pace of the day (I feel that way too, far too often), but now I'm wondering if when we immerse ourselves in the abundant life He Himself has given us, aren't we immersing ourselves in Him there too? He's as present in the midst of His own gift of abundant life as anywhere, isn't He? It's just a different facet of our connection with Him. Even the people we meet along the way are part of that connection to/with Him. Many of those encounters enrich our lives so much that the next time we enter into that more formal prayer, we come with even more to celebrate.

My own joy is breaking through...I think the lights are finally back on.

That's what I was trying to say: what Eagle said in post 161576.

Thanks to all the responses about this reflection.

While I know I never lose God, I certainly lose sight of him. That's what I meant. And, when I'm more aware of his presence, I live truer to myself and to him, and love that feeling.

Eagle, yes, I agree. I'm just talking about a more constant awareness which may bvery well be humaly impossible.

I'm so happy to her the ligths are back on. They've been on, but you just haven't been able to see them. Isn't it amazing when we can tap into the light and recognize it for what it is?

Dotsie, I know what you mean with all of this. There have been long stretches of time in my life (the single years) when God was everything - my entire day and life revolved around Him - but those were also the times when the loneliness was most suffocating. And then hubby came along, and there were long stretches of time when I was so busy that I completely "forgot" to spend any time with Him at all - but those were the stretches of time when I was the least lonely. I figured that the absence of that suffocating loneliness was also a gift from God, so I didn't worry too much about not being able to spend as much time with Him.

Now I have time and energy to find better balance...and am finding that it's never the same two days in a row. Some days I'm in constant awareness of God even while attending to hubby and the needs of the day. Other days life gets hectic and I "lose sight of Him"...and miss Him terribly. I think you have the answer, in carving out special time together...just as we do for hubbies and children and other loved ones, so too for God. Some days I crave more of Him, so will find pockets of time throughout the day to just sit still and be with Him; other days I feel His presence throughout the day's activities and it's enough.

I think that when we're in tune to it, something inside of us, perhaps the Holy Spirit, helps us to find the balance that fits our yearnings. It comes down to listening to that voice deep inside of us, then carving whatever amount of time will allow us to spend "enough" time with Him, whatever "enough" is for today.

How to do that around husbands, children, work, chores and day-to-day living is, well, I guess it involves some understanding that we ARE human (and meant to be human!) and perhaps (I'm addressing this part to myself here) I need to lighten up and enjoy the great life He's given me without worrying about Him so much...if that makes sense.

This is an awesome thread, Dotsie. Peacefulness is what I love about the new hobby, hubby and I found. The dog, Wild Bill and I hike through county & state parks and locate geocache, hide & finds. It's a harmless, nature loving pastime. Geology is kind of a "God thing" anyway. I hear what all of you are saying. Hope you can hear what I'm saying!
Prayers and blessings...

Jabber, my favorite ex boyfriend is a hydro-geologist. Water and earth. He's so comfortable in nature, hiking, biking, skiing. I'm thrilled for him that all these years he found a way to combine his love of nature with the science of his mind. Have any of you read the book about Mother Theresa where she at some point in her life spoke about separations from God?