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#111863 - 03/19/07 10:01 AM Worry?
gims Offline
Member

Registered: 01/16/07
Posts: 3404
Loc: USA
Are you a worrier?
How do (did) you deal with it, if you are (were)?

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#111864 - 03/19/07 10:11 AM Re: Worry? [Re: gims]
jawjaw Offline
Da Queen

Registered: 07/02/03
Posts: 12025
Loc: Alabama
I use to be Gimster. I was so bad that if I couldn't find something to worry about, I borrowed trouble from someone else.

Then, I realized how silly it was to worry about things that "might" happen. I started telling myself, "What's the worst thing that could come of this?" When I did, nine times out of ten it wasn't that bad.

I also realized that spending all my time worrying was wasting the time God gave me that could be used LIVING. I believe if a person looks hard enough, they CAN and WILL find something to worry over. Why look? (Not pointing that question at you, just speaking in general terms)

I've found that God always provides and He is always there. That's good enough for me. I'm not saying that I NEVER worry at all, I'm human and old habits die hard. But when the worry tries to invade my mind, I try really hard to go within and understand why I'm concerned by taking an honest look at the situation. Make sense?

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#111865 - 03/19/07 10:43 AM Re: Worry? [Re: jawjaw]
gims Offline
Member

Registered: 01/16/07
Posts: 3404
Loc: USA
It does make sense...
My problem is when a worry comes over me in an instant... like I have an intuitive feeling something is going wrong with one of our children or grandchildren. It's a horrible (and scary) feeling. I use to have thoughts come from nowhere like this about my husband, when he traveled over the road so much. I can pray the feelings down, but the instant they occur is almost unlivable.

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#111866 - 03/19/07 02:40 PM Re: Worry? [Re: gims]
chickadee Offline
Member

Registered: 09/26/04
Posts: 3910
Loc: Alabama
Gimster, It's like a sixth sense that women have, I think. Looking back, had any of the intuitive feelings come true?
_________________________
chick
~ Here is the test to find whether your mission on Earth is finished: if you're alive, it isn't ~
~ Prayer is the most we can do for another human being ~

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#111867 - 03/19/07 05:48 PM Re: Worry? [Re: chickadee]
NewLeaf Offline
Member

Registered: 12/26/05
Posts: 1066
Loc: Deland, Florida
That happens to me sometimes too Gimster. I just pray and usually its nothing really, just not enough sleep or hormones. I think anxiety pays a visit to everyone once in a while. Its normal. JJ and Chickadee, all great input. I need to be reminded of that very often myself.
_________________________
Aarikja Ann

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#111868 - 03/19/07 08:14 PM Re: Worry? [Re: NewLeaf]
celtic_flame Offline


Registered: 11/24/06
Posts: 2930
Loc: Belfast/Northern Ireland
i posted about this earlier today....but i was talking about that intuitive feeling when somthings not write and it isen't right. I spent a looooong time trying to work the diffrence out and still manage to mess it up and get them mixed up..
what jj said about going into the worrie and seeing what its about is stuff i have to do as i am as open to fear and worrie about my loved ones as the next person...To give an example the child will have a temp and in the night i want to cheek he ok a hundred times to make sure he ok. So their something to worrie about their but my head trying to turn it into a disaster. I a lot calmer about that and it had a lot to do with my feeling of loving him so much and not feeling deserving of him. Once i clicked into that the fear thing fall mostlie away...

I also hand over to god in faith that he look after things, so then i gotta trust the process....

the whole is it intutive feeling verses a fear feeling from the subconcise a hard one to seperate from within yourself becouse both can feel verie powerfull and scarrie.
_________________________
"Our attitude either gets in the way or creates a way," Sam Glenn

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#111869 - 03/19/07 09:42 PM Re: Worry? [Re: celtic_flame]
Anno Offline
Member

Registered: 09/15/05
Posts: 4434
Loc: Minneapolis Minnesota
I used to worry, too. No more, got no time for worrying about what could go wrong. I assume that things will turn out for the best, focus on the best possible outcome and find ways to make the best come true.

Here are a couple of tricks I have used to change my fears and worries around. Maybe they will work, maybe not.

If you have to worry, grant yourself a set amount of time each day to worry. Perhaps 15 minutes at the end of the day would work. Then, worry away about anything and everything you wanted to worry about all day long. When the time is up, you stop worrying and focus on all the good things that happened that day (think gratitude). In order for this to work, you have to keep track of what you want to worry about during your worry time and refuse to think about it during the day. It helps when you know that you have an official worry time coming up.

Another one is to make a long list of the worst possible outcomes of a situation. Get it out there, think the worst. Then make a list of the best possible outcomes of a situation. Push yourself to really think of all the good that may come from a situation. This may help in refocusing, finding new strategies to work on, and seeing the picture in a positive light.
_________________________
Follow our story of living, loving and laughing with a debilitating disease:

http://www.multiplesystematrophyandshy-drager.blogspot.com

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#111870 - 03/19/07 10:36 PM Re: Worry? [Re: Anno]
yonuh Offline
Member

Registered: 06/14/06
Posts: 2447
Loc: Arizona
I used to be a worry wort all the time. Now, I ask myself two questions about something I'm worrying about or upset about: Can I control the situation? Will it matter in 5 or 10 years? Usually the answer to both is 'no' so I usually am able to let it go.
_________________________
Well-behaved women rarely make history. - Laurel Thatcher Ulrich
http://ruthrainwater.wordpress.com/
http://newbeginningsgratitudejournal.wordpress.com/
http://sablewings.wordpress.com/

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#111872 - 03/20/07 04:37 AM Re: Worry? [Re: ]
gims Offline
Member

Registered: 01/16/07
Posts: 3404
Loc: USA
chick, if it's a really bad feeling, I tell people I have the feelings about. Because I do that, I can't say that the events didn't come into fruition because my feeling was simply a feeling or didn't because I warned the other party. Sometimes I just tell others about the feeling I had or have. I give my action of telling others the same amount of credit I give for telling the party connected to my feeling. But, on occasion I have had feelings or thoughts and not shared them, and yes a couple of times something did happen. I made mental notes to tell my husband to watch them especially careful, but failed to. He is use to me telling him to beware "for I had a feeling." Just last month, I had a thought about one of the G/Ks hurting themselves on one of the bikes. The weekend after, one of the boys flipped his 4 wheeler. Coincidence? I couldn't tell you, but it sure was close.

I was excited, Anne, thinking I had that book in my library, but it turned out the title I have is "The Gift of Pain." I will look for that book, tho. It sounds very interesting.

The worries I'm really burdened with are the moments of fear I get upon wakening with a terrible feeling something is going to happen, or already has. Those moments happen all the time. I hope it is just hormones or anxiety, NL. I like trying to reason the feelings away. I pray too... a simple childhood practice of mine of praying a bubble around the person or persons. I sometimes still have a hard time shaking the feeling off, though, and end up warning or telling someone.

celtic, I consider the feelings coming from the subconscious as intuitive feelings. I don't know that I can label these feelings inutitive... they certainly seem clouded with "premonition."

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#111873 - 03/20/07 04:57 AM Re: Worry? [Re: gims]
gims Offline
Member

Registered: 01/16/07
Posts: 3404
Loc: USA
Anno, I can apply those technics to my more frivolous (for lack of better word) worries - like having enough to pay a bill, let's say. Frankly, I don't worry about those types of things like I use too. Do you all find that to be true, as you've aged?

I am going to use the second technic, however, on a particular problem we're having with a fellow land owner in our area. In fact, I stopped before responding to your post to grab a legal pad and get some thoughts down that popped into my head, before I forgot them. It's not really a "worry" matter, but a "rights" issue, which has caused me a lot of irritated moments. Then, once I get as many goods and bads as I can think of, I'll apply techic 1 - dedicate a few minutes a day to figure out what we can do about each if they occur. Along with that, I'll mix in Yonuh's questions: "Can I control the situation? Will it matter in 5 or 10 years?" I'm seriously feeling better about this situation, already, just planning to work it out... lol. I'm an avid list maker, so the technic will work well for me, I think.

I'm kind of feeling dumb. As much as I've read, and as much as I think things through, I've not thought to write out what bad might happen versus what good might come of a situation. ME

But, I don't think the technics will help on the worried feelings my original question was pertainging to. When it comes to one of mine hurting or being hurt, I can hardly control how I'm feeling, much less time-slot my worries. Wouldn't want to write down bad things either, from the fear of them possibly taking place. I know, dumb fear, but it is a fear, nonetheless.

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