Is It OK to be Rude?

Rudeness has grown to epidemic proportions. I've written an article on my blog titled: Is Rudeness OK? that might be of interest. http://www.boomerpie.com/

Very well-written article!

I've seen celebrity rudeness and anonymous online rudeness, but I've not experienced face-to-face rudeness so much in my own personal life.....

Why is that? Maybe because I'm seeing way way too many people talking on cell phones anytime, anyplace, anywhere. It's almost as if we've turned into a society of isolated people, walking side by side with each other at the grocery store, but failing to interact, because we are in our own world. It's all about us and whoever we are talking to.

Personally, I have a cell phone which I carry for security reasons and if my husband needs to contact me while he is at work or in transit to home. I made a conscious decision to drive safely and to interact with people around me when in public. I think when we do not look at or talk to those around us in public, they become less important to our personal culture. And that in my opinion is not so good for the culture as a whole, particularly when our children look up to us as role models for their own behavior.

Well as far as rudeness goes they should call this place I live in, instead of Las Vegas it should be named LAS RUDENESS. The tourists that come here will do awful things here they would never try doing at home, they act like jaskass's, and that makes for very rude situations. This ticks of our residents and they then become rude in defense. Its a lose, lose situation...One reason the 'locals' steer clear of the strip, besides been there, done that!

Anne, you are so right. The beaches in Gulf Shores, AL, or in Florida could boast of the same things. Tourist act like tourist...and what's that old saying? No one will treat your home like it's their home, but you. It's a shame. One state I've noticed though, takes it all serious...reallllll serious, and that's Tennessee. My hats off to those folks. You wouldn't believe the hefty fines one could get for littering alone, much less anything else. It is a beautiful state!

Oh the stories I could tell about tourist-rudeness! We've travelled quite a bit over the years and I could write a whole book on tourist-rudeness! It astounds me how people think they can treat service people and other tourists the way they do (not to mention the environment) just because they're away from home.

One of the very worst was in Bermuda. Very tiny country, but very courteous and polite people. We were on a bus, only one door to get in and out. The bus was packed with cruise-ship tourists and Bermudians trying to get to work. There was a guy standing near the front and others in his party near the back, so they were YELLING back and forth such rude and nasty comments about the people, the countryside, the bus...oh it was humiliating and embarrassing to have to sit there and witness this behaviour. (The guy in front was also blocking the way for people to get off the bus). Finally my husband stood up and told the guy to shut-up and gave him a piece of his mind and told him if he didn't like being there to go back home. All the Bermudians on the bus clapped and turned around to thank him. The guy shut up, and they DID get off the bus at the next stop and everyone breathed a huge sigh of relief.

The things they were shouting back and forth are unrepeatable - racist (most Bermudians are black), foul and indescribably intolerably hateful. And when you know how beautiful, peaceful and kind the Bermudians are, it hurts even more.

In Harrods the famous store in London I had a woman who was walking behind me shout.."Walk on"like an army officer as I entered the toy department.
I moved on quickly thinking there was some serious issue .
No it was just a tourist needing to be in first.she may get an answer from some one some day if she tries that again and I wonder what would be suitable...dog training comes to mind..."Sit" perhaps.

Harrods is a must see if in London and she obviously wanted to see it quicker than the rest of us.

Bravo to your hubby Eagle Heart...

I think 'sit' would be an appropriate reply Mountain Ash...

It's not okay to be rude. I was at the Raven's game today. There was some loud mouthguys behind us; foul language and rude comments. My girlfriend turned around and said, "Hey, watch it." They laughed and snickered, but never screamed any obscenities again.

The surprising thing was that I thought they were 20 somethings who were carrying on, but when I turned around to look, they were about 12 years-old. I was shocked that they were so young and so rude. There didn't seem to be any parents with them. Odd.

Rudeness knows no age but it's shocking how younger and younger kids are that are okay with cutting loose. I blame the parents and adults around them who allow it.
When in my home my neighbor kids have to be kind to each other, not tattle and not be mean or I send them home. If they 'demand' something I say, "how do you ask for something?" I'm trying to teach them the proper way to do things...and 99.9% of the time they comply...I think when an adult takes the time to show a child the right way to behave they appreciate it. Of course, teenagers are a different story, but still...NOT saying anything when they do something is telling them it's okay to (fill in the blank). I guess I'm old school. I sent a neighbor kid home the other day because she would not listen to me and kept wanting to argue...that doesn't work around Ms Dee...she's getting better...it takes being persistent and letting them know that rudeness isn't going to wash.
Once they're grown...some people do it as a shock factor I think and to 'prove' they're grown and can do what they want...what they're really doing is showing how immature they remain.
Just my ever-so-humble opinion.

Rudeness is never okay.

IMO rudeness indicates bad upbringing!

If you want to see someone who is not comfortable in their own skin, who is immature, needy, and the list goes on, watch how they treat a waitress, cashier, or any other member of a service occupation. It will tell you a lot about a person.

You never know what demons someone else is fighting inside. I have two words I use for myself whenever someone is ugly to me...they are: BE KIND.

"Be Kind" - are the two words I use a lot with our grandson. 2-1/2 years old, but can be quite aggressive at times. Instead of constantly saying "No" or "Don't", I say "Be Kind", and he immediately stops whatever he's doing (usually to his big sister). Those words seem to have a distinct impact on him. I wouldn't hesitate to use them on an adult.

It's true, JJ, so many people are struggling with their own fears, insecurities, situations, losses, angers...it leaks out through a myriad of behaviours, including rudeness.

Bad upbringing would account for rudeness if someone never mixed but once a child attends school and interacts they have the chance to absorb and socialise and the wider world of manners opens up .bad upbringing is maybe a reason but not an excuse once a person knows better

Eagle, how wise to turn it into a positive by saying be kind.

I like to smile at people who are rude. It throws them off a bit. Who knows, maybe not many people have smiled at them in their lives.

I agree that smiling at a rude person could pull the rug from under them. But, I have to admit, when in that situation, the last thing I can do is smile. I think my face would crack.

I used to cower if someone was rude. I was often so taken a back, I just didn't know what to say. But over the years, I have developed a protective shield around me. If I don't like something, I let that person know...not to discipline his/her bad mouth; but to make me feel good.

I like that, "Be kind." Great response!
But sometimes you have to be super human to do that!

Anne
seems to me that having your expertise with your clients is so admirable.
Some people do have faces that scowl but maybe inside they are just thinking.There are also folks who beam a smile most of the time..wise not to appear too happy if someone could misinterpate
it,

Yesterday I was on the phone trying to process two medical referrals with our family doctor's office. The "on hold" time was about 1/2 an hour and when the referral-person answered, she asked me to wait an additional 10 minutes.

I was annoyed but when she came back to take the necessary information for the referrals, I still did my utmost to provide the correct information and correct spellings of names, etc.

All of a sudden she launched into a tirade: "Do you think I am stupid? Do you think I cannot spell? I'll have you know I graduated first grade so you can quit with the simpleton attitude...yadda yadda yadda."

I apologized if I sounded annoyed in any way and asked if we could start over. She continued to demean me, but I hung in there to get the referral process started.

This morning I spoke to the office manager, who said the woman indeed was not herself lately. After we spoke a bit and I identified myself as a nurse, the manager admitted that the woman I had spoken to had breast cancer, and that she learned recently that it had spread. What a terrible situation! (I have faced multiple stereotactic biopsies and am now being closely followed up for a localized breast situation)

So I expressed complete support for the woman and am praying that God will forgive me for every mean thing I thought about that "referral-rep" yesterday following our phone conversation.

Sometimes when people are really rude to us, it might be because they are carrying a cross which has become, at least temporarily, too heavy to bear.

Yes, there are naturally creepy people out there, and they deserve to hear about it in my opinion, but there are others who are just trying to get through the day because of their own personal pain or misfortune.

Yesterday, I got a dose of the latter. Thank God I took the high road with her. (At least I hope I did)