Here's another example: Using emotional abuse
I was a college student, fortunate enough to have a trust fund that had been set up by my grandmother. One afternoon Todd had shown up on campus, which was very surprising. How did he know I would exit the psychology building at precisely 12:50 p.m.? I never shared my schedule with him. He looked old and out of place in his cowboy hat and boots among students in rock-concert t-shirts. I was tempted to ignore him as he walked toward me but was afraid he would make a scene. Todd justified that he followed me because, he said, “I think the world of you. I miss you. Let me take you to the sizzler for lunch.”
“I don’t eat meat.”
“There’s your trouble. You need to put some meat on your bones.”
“I need to study.”
“Woman, you think too much.”
“I have tests tomorrow.”
My excuses were irrelevant to him. He made up my mind for me: “you need a change of pace from sticking your nose in that gibberish.” he took my backpack.
He is being the one to define men’s roles as the stronger gender using chivalry to mask power & control. I had grown up with these attitudes.