I'm sure this will light a fire under some of the folks here BUT the best and only diet to follow is a Vegetarian diet, you can have the soy imitation meat products too if you can stomach them. But a good, clean Organic vegetable is never pumped full of chemicals and hormones which cause the diseases running rampant in our society today. I have decided to go Vegan and eat meat only from Holistisly raised free range chicken or corn fed beef, and then only sparingly. I have sooo many wonderful recipes for entire meals of delicious healthy nourishing foods. I will post some in Recipes and watch my diet from now on my diet buddies...

I have to agree with Chatty here. I haven't had red meat for 35 years (and shell fish because of cholesterol and contaminants) and haven't missed them a bit. I don't buy all that processed junk. Because of both diet and exercise, I think I'm in better shape than average.

As for soy "meats". which I first started eating them 30+ years ago, they were pretty horrid and cardboard-ish. Now most of them are really tasty because they're trying to compete in a larger consumer market.

I am new to the group, so I just found this topic - from last year! - and was blown away by its immediate relevance to my own situation. I see that the lady who started it has not participated since then, so I will not bother her with mail, but I can't let it go without addressing the subject.

A couple of weeks ago, I hit an emotional low. I was talking to my husband about my son's psychotic delusions (which have now been moderated by Risperdal) and it occurred to me that my aspiration to be a writer might be based completely on the DELUSION that I have some special talent.

Have I been delusional my entire life?

I have other competencies that I know are real (computer skills, organizational and problem-solving skills, intellectual skills, ability to perform on the job) because they have all been validated by employer reviews, increases in salary, verbal feedback from others. Now that I am not working outside the home, I even doubt those sometimes. but at least I have pieces of paper in the file that I can pull out and look at, as proof.

I am desperately seeking validation for my writing. Writing classes and amateur writing groups and organizations have told me my work is good -- but I don't think I'll ever believe it, deep down inside, until someone pays me for it.

How to gain peace of mind? To feel good about what I am doing, in the absence of this validation? If I'm completely "psycho" I should give up the effort for good, and try to forget the torture. I tried to do that once, burned all my journals and cried for an entire day, but still ended up writing again. If I am really okay and just suffering from the chronic low self-esteem that has plagued me since adolescence, then I have to find a way to build myself up - but when you are emotionally fragile, there can be no building up without taking a risk of breaking down afterward.

Either way, I suppose I have to accept the fact that I suffer from a mental illness (depression) and learn to cut myself some slack and not always expect to be acknowledged as something special. I have to learn to give myself that reinforcement and support, to become my ally instead of my own worst enemy. That is something which years of therapy have been unable to do. Medication can only go so far. I do not know how to change. I have no faith in myself and I have no faith in any higher power, either.

Anyway, thanks for letting me rave.

It took me years of therapy and getting on the proper meds before I couls accept that the person I am was special. That all of us are special for who we are and how we express that to the ones we love. I've written 6 novels, none of which were ever published, but I'm very proud of what I accomplished.

There was a time a few years ago where not being a published author really made me feel like a failure. Now I know better. Rejection can hurt, but it doesn't diminish who you are or what you have done.

LB, it's not all or nothing. You use a lot of strong words: psycho, burned, torture, delusional, desperate, suffering. Wow! That's scary stuff. You do not need externals for validations. You need to find a way to give yourself credit without seeking it from others. Because from others, it is just a matter of opinion! What if THEY are delusional? What if THEY were the ones who have been psycho all these years and you are the one who is sane? Those profiles and evaluations and reviews are mechanized capitalistic pieces of crap ordained as instruments to make humans perform as robots. It's the process that matters. If you write because you enjoy writing, then that is what is important. Try "The Artist's Way" and"The Right to Write" by Julia Cameron. Read some books about connection to your intuition and insight. Your opinion is the only one that matters, and it's time you get in touch with YOU! Validate yourself, dear friend. I'm for YOU! Jackie, your last line about rejection is excellent! Remind me of that the next time I get a rejection slip, okay?

You can write simply because you love it. There are a lot of published authors that line the shelves of book stores that really stink!

Write for the love of it. Write because it gives you peace. Just write. That's what is important.

Good books, Lynnie. I've used them both. As for the rejections, it's easy for me to say that now. I stopped submitting my stuff 10 years ago because I couldn't take it anymore. But I'll try to remind you.

Suzie, I'm not so famous, and I published a book about surviving sexual assault, including incest, domestic violence, depression, the schizophrenia and alcoholism of my father, the PTSD of my step father, my own PTSD, etc, etc. etc. My book is well-written, if I dare say so myself. I achieved publication by using Print-on-Demand because I had breast cancer, and I wanted to make sure I got published before, well, if, I died. I was tired of waiting for traditional publishers to take notice. Even the Chicken Soup for the Soul series started off as self published. So did the books by Julia Cameron that I mentioned above. You know Dennis Rodman? The basketball player? I mean really, he gets a book published! Publishers are all about the bottom line of making a buck. Celebrity sells. There are a few ethical and conscientious publishers out there that are willing to take a risk on a much needed topic. If you have something to say that will benefit yourself and others, just write. And read. Read what others have written on the same topics as yours. I read others' memoirs all the time. I don't compare, I just want to see what is out there. I'm sorry you have had to experience more than your share of trials and tribulations. It is not fair! What the public would want to hear is how you survived, what you learned, and what lessons they can take away. Love and Light, Lynn

[ November 16, 2005, 09:46 PM: Message edited by: Lynnie ]

I'm waiting for a patient who isn't showing up and logged on to this thread. As usual in these forums, I see such courage and encouragement...we need both.

What I had to get beyond in writing my own novel was thinking I had to be Danielle Steele or nothing! I'm sure I ended up somewhere in between. Putting my writing out there for others to critique was the hardest thing. That was 4 years ago and now my book is on Amazon (just yesterday!). I've decided that rejection slips are God's way of letting us know that even the idiots (the reviewers and naysayers) have their place in this world.

When I was getting my Ph.D. in Psychology, a supervisor wrote that "I was among the worst therapists he had every supervised...no, I was the worst!" Because of that, I changed majors and didn't get back into clinical work until a few years later. But now I've been in practice for 36 years and have helped 8 to 10 thousand people, some significantly. So what did he know!

Same thing with a recent critique of my novel done by some twenty something nitwit with an English major. I took what I felt was useful and discarded the rest.

And just a note on the medication issue. It's very complicated and so individualized. Some respond, some don't, some have terrible side effects, some don't, and, unfortunately, some have fatal consequences, either from the mental illness itself or the medications. But many are also helped. After being in a clinic setting where psychiatrists are available, I know I would never practice in a setting where they are not. We work together (therapist and psychiatrists) to try to come up with the best treatment plans. I am impressed about how well-informed you have all sought to be on the topic, whether it concerns yourself or others.

Hi Karen, thanks for weighing in here. Your book is on Amazon? I'll take a look see. Do you need readers to review it? Wow, I can't believe your supervisor dared to say you were the worst! How damaging that could have been to your self-esteem, your ego, and your career. And I'm glad you know that a critique can often be just a matter of opinion.