Update from Daisygirl:

I stopped by BF's house on my way back from the interview and BF and DS was there with a friend, so I didn't get to talk to DS. DS was doing laundry:-). BF talked to DS about the situation, explaining that his actions and lack of respect do affect other people. I was told that he spoke to his son when those incidents happened, but it was when I wasn't around due to it being a man to man discussion (yelling and probably cursing too). Excuses were still being made for him, he was with a bad GF at the time yada yada. I said no excuses for rudeness. We'll see.

He offered to spend more time at my house before I demanded it. I think it will be a good thing for the son to fend for himself a little more.

For now, crisis averted, but I will be noticing what is going on and I won't do anything crazy. When I discuss this with his son at the appropriate time, I plan to tell him that I won't be joining his pity party for himself. Many many people have crappy childhoods - move on - get unstuck. Well, okay, I'll be a little more diplomatic than that - I'll speak the truth in love.

Dotsie, I've never minded that he's there, my concern has been that he behaves like he's 14 and his dad has been treating him like he's 14. He would never move out with daddy footing the bill for everything and living in a bachelor pad.