gims -- you're on the right path, for sure. Things can only go better for you.

Dotsie -- Your friend's advice does _not_ sound like something we'd do -- calling adult protective services which might eventually get mom removed from her home? She IS competent, which is part of the problem. Except she's old, feeble and can't see very well (or hear for that matter).

Rather, judging from the other stories on here, I think the problem is systemic -- i.e., this is the American way of dealing with the elderly -- and we'd better see that it changes before we're all in that category!!!! Over-medicate, keep them pliable, quiet and hidden. It's a terrible shame. Those institutions need to serve healthy, fresh, nutritious food (which they often don't). And yeah, for that kind of money, someone should be delivering bottles of water daily to everyone, just to make sure they're getting enough.