EW, I've just read this whole post through for the first time. Just a few thoughts... your DIL sounds sick. I wouldn't spend time owrrying that you won't see A for months. I can almost guarantee you that you'll see her sooner. There's no way her mom will be able to keep it together for that long. She'll need a break. This may sound odd, but if I were you, I'd try to check A's body for bruises when you see her. The mom sounds abusive and she's only been with A for such a short period of time. IS she now a stay at home mom? I'd also keep a journal of all this because you may need it in the future.

You are wise to take anti-depressants because this is very sad and heartbreaking. Keep taking care of yourself.

While reading this, I was thinking it would nave been helpful for you to be on the NABBW Empty Nest call yesterday. Much of what you're experiencing is similar. You are grieving the loss of your grandchild.

But if I were you, I wouldn't worry too much. I have a feeling it won't be too long and she may be back in your care. Are you ready for that?

Like jj said, one who sleeps at a family gathering is not well. Does she have many long hours alone with A? Is your son still traveling?

I will keep all of you in my prayers. I'll pray for your son to stand up to her, for her heart to soften and to grow into motherhood, and I'll pray for you and your hubby to lighten up and make the most of each day in spite of your sadness. I'll also pray that whatever you choose to do will be in the best interest of A.