Do you fear death?
No, but I don't want a long drawn-out period of suffering.
Hubbo and I don't talk about much, but after the Terry Schiavo story here a few years ago, I told him that if I was ever in a vegetative state like that -- please pull the plug. To me, nothing would be worse than being stuck inside a body that was never going to recover.

Do you look on it as a reward to life?
no, just the next step in a bodily process.

Do you wish it didn't have to be a part of life?
I accept that someday I will die. I'm not afraid. The only part that bothers me is -- there's never enough time, never.

When you really think about it, does it paint life differently for you?
no. It's not as if this were new information.

Does it challenge your feelings of personal significance?
No. We were meant to have this bodily form in this lifetime. Eventually the body will die. I exist on this plain because I'm supposed to, for now.

Does it render your earthly endeavors meaningless, making you realize how insignificant we each are in the grand scheme of things?
No. Everything/one is small in the grand scheme of things, and everything/one is essential. We are put here for a reason. I believe that everything that is, everything that was, and everything that ever will be -- is connected through time and space and energy. Our significance lies in our being a part of the whole. I believe my/our purpose here is to further that connection and to help others.

A sweater with one piece of yarn missing -- is a sweater with a hole, and the hole grows larger unless another piece of yarn is added. We are all pieces of yarn. Life is the sweater.
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I believe that when a baby comes out of the womb, it's given a soul, which leaves when the body dies.
I believe this body is one of many that has housed my soul. I have at least one more go-round after this.
It is not my place to speculate about other soul's future(s).

Part and parcel of Catholic praxis is a lifetime preparation for one's death and because of it, I tend to look at death from within theological context and treat it as historical (from the catechetical thesis of Adam/Eve and Resurrection) rather than a natural order of things. How I live my life, the mistakes I commit in my lifetime for which a perfect contrition would merit redemption, the promise of salvation and the afterlife all connect to each other. I find no room for fear, it gets edged out by faith and hope.

and love!

Yes, love! Thanks, Dotsie. How could I have forgotten to expressly state that?

I'm bringing this back up so Eagle can see it if she wants.

Okay, here goes, after much thought and being inspired by Meredith's response. I'll preface this by saying that I've been plagued by suicidal thinking since I was 13 years old. Those thoughts can still whisper in my ear when I'm overwhelmed by sadness, grief or clinical depression. After years of therapy, I've resigned myself to the possibility that those thoughts will be a constant companion for as long as I live. So I've worked hard to educate and arm myself, through self-knowledge, love, forgiveness and a vigilant awareness of their presence on the periphery of my mind. Now whenever they appear, I immediately fling truth (that they are symptoms of an illness) and choice (I choose to live) at them...it seems that the more truth and choice I fling at them, the more powerful that truth and choice become.

Do you fear death?
I used to fear the pain of dying, but after having watched so many loved ones die, I’ve realized that there seems to be a special buffer between one’s spirit and the pain at the time of death…so I no longer fear the actual process of dying – I know that my God will send me all the help I need (Jesus, angels, my loved ones) to cross over. What I DO fear is dying before I’ve really learned how to live.

Do you look on death as a reward to life?
No, just passing through to another facet of being. I see LIFE as a much-to-be-cherished gift from God – the chance to experience the joy and power of creation, love and existence as a spirit-being in human form.

Do you wish it didn’t have to be a part of life?
I wish we didn’t have to say good-bye (even if only temporarily) to the people we love and who have been such a vibrant, significant part of our lives. But I know it’s an unchangeable reality, perhaps necessary in order for others to be allowed to come and experience life-on-earth in their own turn and time.

When you really think about it, does it paint life differently for you?
The more death I experience, the more it teaches me about life. I realize what a gift it is to be alive for another day. So death paints each new day with its own wondrous kaleidoscope of colours, discoveries, encounters and callings. Death urges me to search out what I’m meant to discover and weave into my life today.

Does it challenge your feelings of personal significance?
No. Every day when I wake up, no matter how sad, crappy, sick, joyful, glad or anything in between I may feel, I know without a doubt that I’m meant to be alive today. I matter. My life matters, to God, to my husband – to me! I’m glad to be alive. And I’m glad to be me, even if I don’t always know who “me” is or like what that “me” does. I’m learning to embrace my life in all its shades & colours, in all its pain & glory and even in all its sometimes tedious mediocrity – because I know I’m a work in progress and I’m just choosing to embrace –and be grateful for - the journey itself.

Does it render your earthly endeavors meaningless making you realize how insignificant we each are in the grand scheme of things?
NO, each death makes me realize even more that my existence here-and-now is not only significant, it’s ESSENTIAL. Maybe I can’t see how my piece of the puzzle fits, but God can, and somehow my life, my ability to get out of bed and live today fits into His “grand scheme of things”. And that’s enough for me.

I have to echo Meredith, because she says it so beautifully: “Everything/one is small in the grand scheme of things, and everything/one is essential. We are put here for a reason. I believe that everything that is, everything that was, and everything that ever will be -- is connected through time and space and energy. Our significance lies in our being a part of the whole. I believe my/our purpose here is to further that connection and to help others.

A sweater with one piece of yarn missing -- is a sweater with a hole, and the hole grows larger unless another piece of yarn is added. We are all pieces of yarn. Life is the sweater.”

I hate to sound cold and uncaring, because I am neither BUT no matter how we feel about death or what we say about death, there are only two definites in this world, one is LIFE and the other is DEATH!!!!!

And, Meredith's "One Month" is a beautiful poem of reflection for the in-between.

Meredith, can we post your "One Month" here?

Chatty, some of us just need to grapple with aspects of both of those realities in order to come to some peace with, as Lola calls it, the "in-between" time. I enjoy these types of philosophical discussions - but it's hard to find other people who do, or who have the time to - and very few people want to discuss death, so when this kind of discussion comes up here, I enjoy participating and hearing other people's thoughts.

I saw this excellent PBS series a few years ago and think it should be mandatory for everybody. It goes where this thread is trying to go, a place uncomfortable for so many people.

It is by Bill Moyers and is called "On Our Own Terms: Moyers on Dying." Description from website: http://www.pbs.org/wnet/onourownterms/

"There is a great divide separating the kind of care Americans say they want at the end of life and what our culture currently provides. Surveys show that we want to die at home, free of pain, surrounded by the people we love. But the vast majority of us die in the hospital, alone, and experiencing unnecessary discomfort. Bill Moyers goes from the bedsides of the dying to the front lines of a movement to improve end-of-life care in ON OUR OWN TERMS: Moyers on Dying. Two years in production, this four-part, six-hour series crosses the country from hospitals to hospices to homes to capture some of the most intimate stories ever filmed and the most candid conversations ever shared with a television audience."