EmyJay I would encourage you to visit the website of an on-line friend who has helped me figure out some things with my now ex-husband. Do a google search for Bonnie Kaye, you will find her site. She is a phycologist (sp?) who has gone through very similar circumstances. She is open and will respond if you e-mail her.
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starting over

How we handle change determines our Destiny. P. Trapp
www.pattiswriting.com
www.marykay.com/ptrapp777