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#11698 - 10/18/04 06:03 PM
Re: Father and Mother depressed, any suggestions?
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Member
Registered: 11/08/03
Posts: 3512
Loc: outer space
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Dotsie, You are so right. Loneliness is a horrible wound to our world. Sometimes I think it may be a fatal wound. I agree that the next generation may endure it to an even greater degree partially as a result of technology. Or maybe we have become so separated from ourselves and distrustful of others that we can no longer experience intimacy through human contact and must have miles of technology to separate us. Gee, what a sad thought.
I would love to reach out to those who are lonely. but I don't always do it. I have several friends who are widows in their 70's and 80's who seem so very lonely. I call as often as I can and take them places and generally try to keep in contact, but I'm sure they are still lonely often. They are all mothers of very successful children who are now adults which frightens me for my own children. We are still very close at this time, but there may be a day when they are far too busy to visit and call. Gee, I hope not.
I posted on here about loneliness a while back and I mentioned that I had tried to research it. I found almost nothing in the medical library and when I did a google search for "Loneliness," I came up with almost nothing except porn sites. It concerned me that porn is the only answer we have for loneliness. Is that all we can do as a society? And are those sites a comfort?
I wonder if they are the greatest risk the lonely can take. Maybe it's the anonymity that attracts them or maybe the desire just to 'feel' something. I can see why the lonely don't reach out. It is as if loneliness is contagious and will infect anyone touched by a lonely person. And being lonely does not seem to offer any immunity. If anything, it seems to lessen the immunity.
I am concerned, but I too have no answers. However, I will call a lonely friend right now. Thanks for the reminder. smile
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#11700 - 10/19/04 11:49 AM
Re: Father and Mother depressed, any suggestions?
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Member
Registered: 10/09/04
Posts: 83
Loc: Maryland
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Hello all, Thanks for the welcome. If you want to know more about me, check-out the Welcome Forum for probably more than you need to know.
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#11701 - 10/19/04 01:25 PM
Re: Father and Mother depressed, any suggestions?
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Founder
Registered: 07/09/08
Posts: 23647
Loc: Maryland
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Misfire, I was there and responded. Welcome again. Agate, you are doing everything right for your mom. What a blessing you are! You should be an advocate for the elderly. Had it not been for you she could still be bedridden. Chatty's comment is right on!
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#11704 - 10/19/04 10:58 PM
Re: Father and Mother depressed, any suggestions?
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Member
Registered: 10/08/04
Posts: 1274
Loc: MD
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[ April 07, 2005, 01:12 AM: Message edited by: Nancy50 ]
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#11706 - 10/20/04 02:43 PM
Re: Father and Mother depressed, any suggestions?
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Founder
Registered: 07/09/08
Posts: 23647
Loc: Maryland
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Chatty, stay on your soap box. I need it. Directly behind me sits a home for the elderly. When the kids were little we strolled them in frontof the home most nights in good weather. Our son who is 19 would sing his latest rendition of any new song he learned: Twinkle, Twinkle, Jesus Loves Me, whatever. It was a ministry and we didn't even realize it. I somehow need to revisit that. Thanks for the reminder. Smile, we are getting closer to that age where we may be the ones in those high chairs and wheel chairs with drool on our chins. That alone should shake us into doing something! I've done lots of visiting the elderly through my church in the past. For whatever reason I've stopped. It's time to get back to it. I recall visiting a lovely woman of faith who had been involved in every way imaginable for years at our church. Even though I was the one who was supposedly ministering to her, I never left without feeling blessed and uplifted. She was so wise and gracious. Give and receive!
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#11707 - 10/21/04 02:45 PM
Re: Father and Mother depressed, any suggestions?
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Member
Registered: 10/30/02
Posts: 68
Loc: Towson, MD
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Thisle, I would love to talk with you 1 on 1. Dotsie can give you my email or phone number. Your mother-in-law sounds like she could be my mother's twin. My mother is in assisted living (al) an hour from me. She too needs constant entertaining. She has no hobbies and now she has trouble moving around, and can no longer drive. My father died in April and her companion of 54 years is gone. She used to play bridge but doesn't do that any longer. She had a stoke in her eye that left her basicly blind in the R eye, but she sees well out of the L. She doesn't read, only the obits and not even that every day. She doesn't like listening to music or watching tv. She actually hates tv, and rarely enjoys a movie, tho she has a DVD player. She is a problem. She does get to eat with friends every thurs. dinner, but there leaves the rest of the week. A friend is taking her to church on Sundays, but she isn't able to do anything else at church, she's on a walker and has alzheimers. Unfortunately her family isn't near. I am 1 hour away and my brother is in HI. Her grandchildren, 2 are in college (NC) and 1 is in high school here in Baltimore. I try to see her at least every 10 days. We talk daily. But, that is never enough. I am at a loss for what to do. The AL has activities every day. She won't go because "every one just sleeps". But, she sleeps too and doesn't realize she is. If anyone has suggestions, please let me know.
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