Starting Over, that really is a good idea about writing down the memories...one of the most agonizing problems in my early grief right now is that all or most of my memories center around my brother's cancer - he lived for 43 years and had the cancer for only 8 months of those 43 years, but it's all I can remember right now...his pain, discomfort, disfiguration and gradual disintegration. And when I try to remember his life BC (before cancer), my mind just flips those memories forward into the cancer memories. Very frustrating. I know it will pass and eventually the other memories will hold their own special place in my mind, but right now it's not working. If I had something in writing, it would probably force me to move beyond the cancer memories and remember the better times in his life.