Hi Emily, we haven't met before and I just now stumbled across your posts. You may not realize it, but you've made remarkable progress since you started posting. I can read it in your words.

I'm also diagnosed with Chronic Depression. Along with Bipolar II and Social Anxiety Disorder and Generalized Anxiety Disorder.

I think you've found a great doctor. I hope your insurance continues to keep him on your plan. He sounds like he really knows what he's doing and will help you find a therapist who will truly help you.

Yes, your doctor is right. There are many medications used to treat depression. So many. And, it does take time and trial and error to discover which ones work for you. There's no magic pill. There's no easy treatment. Every person is different. What works for me, may not work for you. It took me and my doctor a year or so to finally figure out a combination that started working and sometimes he still tweaks my meds. Just recently we went through a small change. It didn't work, so I'm back taking what I was taking before, but that's what I like about my doctor. He's willing to help me find any way possible for me to function in the real world.

The weather can play a part in your depression. We all feel so much better when the day is beautiful and the sun is shining. Our moods lift naturally. Spring is here. The flowers will be blooming and the trees turning green.

When I was going through my bouts of depression, I would read or watch movies to distract me from my thoughts. I found a lot of new authors that way. What kind of books do you like to read? Do you like romances or mysteries? Suspense or horror? Are you open to trying new authors and new books? I noticed you were asking about humor books to help you. A few people mentioned JJ's book. It's called 'A funny thing happened on the way to the throne' and the author is Georgia Richardson. You can find her website at http://www.queenjawjaw.com/

If you go to Amazon.com and search for "women, humor" you'll come up with a list like this:
http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_ss_b/102-...o.y=0&Go=Go

Lots of books to choose from on this list.

You asked if you can change. Yes you can. Because, Depression is not who you are. It's a symptom. A disease. A disorder. It's not the "real" you. With medication and therapy, you can overcome the depression and break out into the person you truly are and want to be. It will happen. It happened for me. I know it will happen for you too.

If you ever want to e-mail me privately, please feel free to do so. I'd be glad to chat with you.

Hugs,

You asked if you can change. Yes you can. Because, Depression is not who you are. It's a symptom. A disease. A disorder. It's not the "real" you. With medication and therapy, you can overcome the depression and break out into the person you truly are and want to be. It will happen. It happened for me. I know it will happen for you too.
VICKIES QUOTE

this i understand and agree with as with di a whole new woman under all the oppresive thinking.

best of luck with the cognitive theripie and it is kinda exiting knowing whats in store for you...its all out their in your pathway waiting for you....hope it all goes smoth and quicklie for you, transition to new doc wise

I, too, am excited for you. You have a wonderful present to open up - that present is giving yourself back to the world.

It may not be the easiest trip you have ever taken, but it may be the best. The very best to you.

Emjay....it can only go up from here on in, (baby steps if needed ) I am delighted for you re the cognitive therapy...it can be a wonderful time for you as you get an opportunity to 'tweak' some of the older played out patterns of thinking which may not be the healthiest for you..and a journey like that if construed as a gift(even when challenging)is amazing.

Still in my thoughts

Popea

My personality disorder controlled my life for 35+ years. Every trouble, every tear, every terrible situation I found myself in - I can contribute to the disorder.

BUT, I never stopped looking for an answer to WHY --

and now I know that the JOURNEY made me what I am today -- not the disorder -- and though it took a loooong time -- it was worth the trip

We're here for you

Carolyn

Anyone heard from Emjay? How are you doing girlfriend?

No, I haven't. I'll send her a private message.

I sent one on the 15th. Yoo hoo Emjay, where are you.

Still no answer here. Praying for you girlfriend.

Drop by when you can Emjay! We're all holding you close!