Thanks foundhervoice. You're right we do have to stick together. Unless you are living or have lived through the nightmare of divorce you have no clue just how much emotional trauma each day brings. I understand what your lawyer is saying about work, but perhaps you could do some freelance work or work where you are paid as an independent contractor (in other words no taxes are taken out--you have to pay in April)

Also I would move your banking to a new bank. Just found out my husband has supeonea'd my bank records.....If I had known that I would have moved to a new bank.

Also last minute update. Now he is on a campaign to 'win me back'. Since last Friday I have been bombarded with text messages, phone calls, e-mail. Yesterday a huge poinsetts was delivered, last night when I got home from work there was a box from UPS, inside was several presents for me and my son. 6 mos. ago it was just sign this paper and we can end this divorce right away (I would have been crazy to sign--he got 1/2 and I got all debts!) He said it was taking too long and he watned to get on with his life. Now it's oh, honey, I love you I miss you....Yeah right.

He's either worried that he might not come out of divorce in good shape OR he is trying to get me off balance while he manuevers behind my back (like getting bank records) OR he's hoping I'll feel guilty and be 'nice' in court.

Why are men such slimeballs? I'll say it again, better to be single and happy and not be at risk than live in such craziness.

Anyway, Merry Christmas all. Foundhervoice, no matter how bad it gets, just remember, this too you will survive. It will get worse before it gets better, but oh, the joy that comes in the morning! And once survived, you will emerge stronger, more confidant, with more self-esteem and the ability to minister to others in a similar situation. You will be blessed!