Pattyann -

I can understand wanting to just get it over with and move on with your life. It seems to me that so much valuable time is wasted on unproductive thoughts and behaviors. But a friend of mine who recently went through an ugly divorce advised me to think of this period as a temporary job; one that will help me get a financial footing so that I will be able to move on and ultimately have fewer regrets. I keep hearing stories from women who gave up the fight because it was too nasty and draining, and I am sometimes tempted to follow suit. But then I look at my children who are working part-time after school because of necessity - not because it is a cool thing to do - and I realize that I owe it to them to get the most I can out of this, within reason, of course. They are at an age where they have pretty clear cut ideas about justice,and what is right and wrong. They know that their dad is trying to shaft me because they see him conducting business deals on the sly (he must think they are deaf and blind!)when they are with him for the week, and they have mentioned it to me because they are outraged. I do not intend to involve them in this fight, but I also do not want them to see me roll over and play dead...I guess that at some point it could stop being worth it, but I am not there yet...