this has been a long hard struggle for you kate, i hope you find some help for yourself when you see the doc. Its typical that an addict child distrupts the whole familly, addiction as a family disease- even if only one is addicted. In my experience I also agree with casy it takes a long time in recovery before the addiction, even if they are clean subsides enough so that they can look outside themselfs, its a self-centred self-obsessed type of condition. One day at a time attitude dose help tremendously especilly wwhen it all seems like its too much in total getting throw 24 hours is a feet in itself.

Hope you manage without it pulling you down much more. I know its hard waiting for someone you care about to bottom out especilly as we are all mums and somehow mums are ment to be there and sort out for our kids but their comes a time to let our kids be adult and responcible and be on their own 2 feet regardless of what that means to them. Unfortunitly and in this situasion you are powerless over your sons behaviour and choices he makes. The only thing you can be responcible over and have limited control over is your own life and focus. I have been obsessed and distressed beyond reson with addicts behaving badly in my life and all it ever did was make me unwell drag me down and wast my time and my energy as i stoped living my life or even when i was doing my life mentally i was still with them..

No ones suggesting you let your son be and focus on yourself and other kids becouse they don't care about the addicted son, if anything they saying what they are saying becouse they do care, but more importantly care about you making it throw this ok...either choice you make is hard and gonna be harder at times...god bless and guide you as you choice and live by the consiquincess. Hope i can be a support to you any time you need one