Kate-
I am so sorry. I think you have to hold him accountable for his actions and let him know your disappointment in his choices. And then I think I would give him his consequence. It sounds like he has had many many chances to make it right and keeps going back. I live with a recovering alcoholic.In my mind, it is all the same - just a different drug of choice. Its time for some tough love. Unfortunately, they have to hit their bottom, and even tho he was in jail, it sounds like he still has not hit. My heart aches for you. It will take strength to follow thru. Do you have anyone you can talk to? Maybe you need someone who can help you stay strong.I will keep you in my prayers.
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Cathy