Hi Kate,
Interesting discussion topic. I have been with my husband for 30 years - 7 living together and 23 married. We met when I was 17 and he was 19, and have been together ever since.

We have both grown and changed, but I think me more-so than him. As I have aged, I've become more confident in myself and my skills, and have many dreams I would like to fullfill. My husband has always been very supportive of my ideas and dreams, but not really actively involved in them.

I think that is the one thing that is hard about our marriage - I love going to company parties, conferences, theme parks, busy places, etc. He hates crowds and lines and talking to people he doesn't really know or want to get to know. So at this time, and I imagine into the future, I will continue to do what I like to do, and he'll stay home or hang with his family/friends.

He doesn't mind when I do these things, and I don't mind if he wants to stay home, but I feel in the long run, we WILL need to find more things to do together, especially after the kids are all gone (3 years to go!). While I don't mind doing lots of things without him, I DO want to share adventures and events with him as well.

We rarely fight or argue, since we both have always been comfortable with the fact that we are different from each other (mostly in social situations) and must allow these differences in respect to each other. Sometimes I dream about living alone and doing what I want all the time without worrying about anyone else, but that seems to be a little fantasy I have when things are stressful around here and it soon passes.

While it may sound fun to be on my own again, I do love having someone to come home to at the end of the day, and someone who knows me so well that I don't have to explain every little thing. While our lives may not be the most exciting and passionate of married couples on earth (but it is good!), the grass may not always be greener on the other side.

My 2 cents!

Kathy