Number5, I totally understand how you want to be everythig to everyone. You are in the middle, which is an awful place to be. There has to be a way that you can be there for those who need you, at the same time, not killing yourself!
I understand wanting to help your daughter and granddaughter. It sounds like your daughter takes advantage of you, though. Why does she need to spend hours working out while you are watching her child, while sick and exhausted? You have to let everyone around you know that you are human and you have limits. 3 year olds are very tiring.
Your husband sounds very immature and expects you to be his mommy, too. He took on your kids when he married you and you took on his. He shouldn't tell you that you'd be abandoning him.
I really don't have any answers for you, but you keep saying what you need. I'm wondering if you've told THEM what you need? They will put you in an early grave if they all keep putting this stuff on you and then they'd have to manage w/o you anyway.
I hope I don't sound too harsh here, I don't mean to be. Believe me, I have always tried to take care of everyone in my life and it doesn't
work. It upsets me when I hear about wonderful women like you, being taken advantage of.

[ January 16, 2006, 03:57 PM: Message edited by: Bluebird ]