Hello Meredith, I appreciate your heart felt post here, and delving into these deeply personal issues. You’re ahead of the verbal abuse game by recognizing that you experienced it with your husband because that it what you were used to. Of course, just because we are used to it doesn’t make it right! I’m sorry to hear that your own mother was insulting to you. I hope your husband is indeed changing, because thus far the burden has been on you to take action by walking out. That you two “don’t do much of anything” is uncomfortable, because in the absence of fighting, one would hope more loving behaviors could be learned. I sensed some tension when you mentioned that you had gone to a bead expo, and you bought supplies for the year, and he didn’t like that you spent the money. It takes an investment in goods to make money! I hope he appreciates your many wonderful talents. If you ever get a chance, check out the book “The Verbally Abusive Relationship.” It is a short but enlightening read. Patricia Evans is an expert on the subject.