Dear Friends, you have such compassion for the "victims" and awareness of the issues. I am heartened to see the discussion amongst you. Unique, I am so sorry you experienced abuse. You are so right: you don't have to be beaten to be abused, which is why I was glad that the power and control list illustrated covert avenues to abuse. Blaming the victim is a common attitude in our society. The question is often asked "Why didn't she leave" when in fact the question should be "Why didn't he stop." As for justice, a restraining order means NOTHING to an abuser, if the victim can indeed get one. Usually, the abuser has to already have harmed the victim in front of a witness before a restraining order is issued. More in the next window.

[ February 15, 2006, 12:13 AM: Message edited by: Lynnie ]