Just thought I'd respond to this thread.

As many of you know, I'm married to a drainer. Mr. Negativity. Mr. "Never found a problem he couldn't complain about for 20 years." Mr. Whine-whine-whine. A black hole that can never have enough, or be loved enough.

It took me decades, but I learned to step back. Have my own friends and my own interests. Not try to fix his problems. Refuse to get sucked into useless repetitive fights, and physically walk out when necessary.

I've let go of most of the anger. I'm a better person because I no longer drain all my energy reacting to him -- I spend it on me.

When we get caught in someone else's web, we forget that we once knew how to fly.

Sometimes our only limits are those we let others impose upon us.