Hello, Boomers,
I joined this forum back in the spring, posting my heartache at the ending of a relationship with a man I'd met online. He's a Psychology Ph.D., talented musician, age 50, unemployed at the time and babysitting a 3 year old. You all encouraged me and chastised me to "get over it!" and I worked mightily to do so.
I took two graduate classes during the summer, and when those ended, I spent time with my twin grandsons in Louisville, all the while working 24/7 to recover, and I DID!!! Over the summer, while I was still struggling, I did send him infrequent emails telling him how I was moving through the stages of grief, very sad at the thought of never having him in my life, to which he replied "sorry you are having a hard time, but I'm very busy." He had been hired as a professor at a local university and was "writing sylabii." Anyway, I finally realized that contacting him was counterproductive to my healing, and stopped! Now, after this extended time, I receive a phone message (which I didn't answer) of how he is thinking of me, our visits to museums, and how sweet, smart, and sexy I am.
Though I didn't answer the phone, as I was already in bed at 8:00 Sunday night after an exhausting day, it did stir me up, and I responded with a generic kind of email asking about his new job, and signing it, "Your friend."
Almost a week has passed, and I have had no response. What do you all make of this?
I think Chatty had said I might hear from him again when he was in a "lull" from other relationshps. Maybe that is the case. As far as I know, he has been seeing no one else, and I had asked him to share that with me if that were the case.
I was crazy about the man, but I'm also very aware of how much effort it took on my part alone to recover from contact with him. I'm proud that I DID recover, and am walking thru my days now without depression and feeling numb.
I have realized for some time now that I was too "needy" in the time with him, trying to draw from him more than he was willing to give. So now, I'm wondering why he contacted me with such an emotional and encouraging message.
I would truly appreciate your responses and insights.
Ariadne