I don't think it's a question of whether the monkeys couldn't control themselves. Monkeys don't have control issues with "should"s and "shouldn't"s. They just do what they do because they want to. And because they mate with monkeys from a lower social strata, doesn't mean the relationship is destructive.

You, on the other hand, are in a destructive relationship. I agree with the other posts here. You're addicted because you think that if you leave him, you'll never have great sex again.

Wrong.