There is one more step that has to come out of "getting it all out in the open". Change.
For example, if my husband says "I don't like celery in my salad" I will make sure I never put celery in the salad again. (This actually happened.) It seems so simple! If I say " I don't like it when you pile all your stuff on my dresser" don't you know that he continues to do it!! I think some people just take longer to have things get through into their brains! Of course, throwing his stuff onto the floor accelerates this process! [Wink]