Is there some kind of hidden anger going on? Is your son carrying animosity toward you for some unknown reason? I just don't understand how a spouse can carry so much influence without it. Just asking as my stepson and wife are pregnant and I know I'll rarely see the baby. I'm not even sure what I'll be to the baby. Sad.

I know it's not easy to always hop on a plane and I don't know where you live but I signed up for Southwest Airlines announcements and always watch for special deals on flights to AZ. I've found some really cheap ones. I have six grandkids and they all live in Az so I understand the distance and how your arms ache to hold those children.

I'm really sorry you're going through this pain. It must be awful.