Any thoughts on at what point do you need to forget? My husband and his brother grew up with an alcoholic, abusive father. My brother-in-law said to me this summer that he could forgive his father, but never forget what he did to them. My answer to that was at some point though, he'll have to put it behind him and carry on with the process of healing. But maybe I'm wrong???? My husband is still dealing with the forgiveness issue ......Different story - my dad and his only full brother just reunited this past summer after not having seen each other for over 33 years - a lot of family issues/dynamics kept them from having much of a relationship - and yet, they managed to put that behind them, greet each other joyfully, reminisce, and just spend time together without blaming anyone. It's a moving experience when you can see forgiveness work its healing.