I woke up this morning with memories of myt three yr old's first fishing trip and i did everything i could to keep from crying until my room mate left.

My son was 3 and was down at the lake with his dad , while I stayed behind with his one yr old sister.

Before I knew what was happening, my son and his dad were coming back. My son was in tears and his dad was furious and angry. My ex threw down the fishing poles and proceeded to walk away. When I asked what happened he said ask your son.

Well wonderful my husband was walking up the trail cooling off as I look to my son who has tear streaks running down his face and marks on his arms. All he could repeat was its my fault and im bad.

So I'm guessing my ex threw my sons line in the water , handed him the pole after securing it to the ground and threw his own line in. By the time he has settled my son has realed his line in to see if he cought a fish, (now mind you this is speculation since i was not there) After two or so more times he,my ex got made and touched my son making his cry. Well this did not sit well with me, how dare he lay hands on my son, he was three and this was a new adventure to him. One his dad could have clearly enjoyed with his son.

Well any way after calming my son down as a mom would I screamed quietly at my husband and ignored him the rest of the day , consentrating on my kids.

Well this morning as i was cooking breakfast for my room mate that vision or memory came back to me in full force and i was taken off track. Now mind you my son is now 17 18 and probably has forgotten that memory himself, why am i remembering it ,, it cant be just a nastalgia thing or a moms memory thing, there are days i go without thinking of my kids or ex at all then boom they hit full force knocking me for a loop.

I feel better just sharing this very personal experience, I guess my question is , why am I suddenly remembering these times now?

oh well, back to cleaning house and trying to get on with things.

Deb