i have found if we have the parties at our house and let our kids invite their friends we have more luck. that way the others have to worry about their families dealing with the outings!!! the only problem is sometimes our kids and their friends can be rather embarrassing!! we always give the forewarning and hope for the best when folks arrive. if it goes downhill...well just keep giving the guests tons of liquor, make 'em sleep on the couch or arrange for them to get a limo home or something and hope they forget about our obnoxious kids by the following day! boy oh boy what fun we have to look forward to for the holidays!