My Mom has been gone since the end of 1998 and there isn't a day that goes by I don't pick up the telephone to call her. I am always talking to her and to Tim...I believe they are around me all the time.

I truly believe that there is a hereafter...my mother was talking to her parents in the weeks before she died and they had both been gone for years. We had a booklet (Gone From My Sight) given to us by the hospice volunteers after she died and every single thing it said she would do while she was dying, she had done. We were amazed!
I am anxious to "see" everyone there when it's my time. But, I believe that they are here with us all the time, protecting us and watching over us.
So, I know when my father does come upon his time, she and Tim and all the others will be waiting for him and helping him along.

I'm not sure why I am brooding about this. I usually am very upbeat no matter what the issue. When Tim was diagnosed, I needed to know everything about the disease and what would happen, and what we needed to do. He just wanted to not think about it. I guess I am just a bit too inquisitive for my own good and I think too much.

I turned 55 in August and my age has never bothered me, but this year I am really noticing the age of others that are winding down to the end of their lives. My Mom's aunt and 2 uncles are all three very ill with various things (She is 90 and has the same stuff my mother had and diabetes, her husband is 88 and has Aadvanced-stage Alzheimers', and the other uncle is 95, almost deaf and blind, has all the same heart stuff as Mom had plus emphysema. The two men are now in nursing homes.) and it is scary to see. I keep thinking, although I try not to, what will I do when it is my time for all that. There won't be anyone at all because I have no children and my husband and parents will be gone. Scary thoughts, huh?