Dreamer,
Is your friend in pain from loneliness? If not, maybe she's simply alone and enjoying it. I think its the reisitance to our emotions that causes simple aloneness to turn to painful loneliness.
I wonder how to deal with it as much as you do and I have no answers. I see it everywhere. I too have friends, some of whom are married who appear to be so lonely. In fact, the loneliest I've ever been was in a marriage now over, but very painful at the time.

It's a complex issue.
smile