I am absolutely exhausted. My dad is 93 and had been living with my sister for many years. Things all came apart when he had to be hospitalized at the end of March. He was transferred to a rehab facility and my sister asked for help.

Frankly, the relationship between the two of them has been deteriorating -- she has a lot of problems of her own -- and I just got busy. Not surprisingly, it turned out that moving him out here would be much cheaper and there's a very nice place. Between my brother and me, we arranged for transfer, plane, lease, deposit, furniture, etc. etc.

Fortunately, it's all going well. My dad's care has improved tremendously -- he was still climbing stairs as my sister's house -- he's cleaner, safer, better fed, etc., and keeps thanking me for bring him out here.

BUT -- his banking stuff is a mess and my brother and I are still trying to get his direct deposits to a bank here, there are doctor appts to make, equipment to get, and on and on. (My brother chose to throw out some of his clothes because they were just too ratty to bring here.)

This is what happens when two people are living together who both need various kinds of help. My dad is continually amazed that people are checking on him and giving him his meds and helping him bathe -- and that they are so nice. I told him there was the basic package and the nice one and I went for the nice one.

We're finally in a bit of a routine. Without my brother's help I don't know what we would have done. They ought to have a 4-hour course on all the basics you need to hit when you make a change like this: doctors, insurance, funeral arrangements, living places, etc.