Hi Judy,

If it (your body image) is bothering you, then it is a problem for you, and I'd like to think that we forum members are here for everyone, no matter what they want to talk about.

The forum IS different these days, probably especially since Chatty died. But please don't think that we are all callous and don't care about your feelings. We're just in a state of transition -- but then life is always in a state of transition. If things weren't changing, we'd all be dead, right?

I don't know anything about dysmorphia, that is a new term for me, but I did look it up online, and Web MD has a pretty good description of it, for anyone else who might be as puzzled as I was.

I don't have any similar experiences to share. But I do think that if this problem is bothering you as much as you say it is, it's time to stop trying to tell yourself that you are strong enough to deal with it alone. That's being abusive to yourself.

Instead, be kind to yourself --be self-loving -- and consult with an expert who can get you some assistance.

IMHO life is too short to waste it worrying over having gained a dress size: as we age, our weight redistributes and other than becoming a "gym rat" (as in someone who lives in the gym and works out constantly) in order to maintain a former dress size there's not much to do except gracefully accept this.

I'm sure I'm of this opinion because my first husband died of cancer before he was 45. He never had a chance to see his kids get into high school, much less graduate from college, find careers, marry or have children of their own.

When he died, I promised our kids I would take good care of myself, so they wouldn't lose both parents too early. I have tried to do that. Please try to take care of yourself, JudyM, so you can be there, as long as possible, for YOUR family. I'm sure you'll find that this is pretty important to them, too!