When I was married, I stayed at home a few times and hated it. We compromised; I went to work and hubby stayed home - mostly because I liked working and he liked the domestic stuff. .................................................I truly admire those women who can cook and clean and sew and all that. Even in Home Ec at school, the teacher wrote on my report card that I "didn't see why I had to do this." I would have been happier in Shop but that option wasn't available in the late 50s and early 60s. I had to fight just to be allowed into advanced math and science classes in high school because girls weren't considered to be any good at science!!
It is important for women who are mothers to be honest about this..just too many women I know who are made to feel guilty for not expressing more clearly the bad/difficult times of being a stay-at-home parent. Raising children is hard work.
My 2 sisters who decided to continue their paid careers, have said clearly they didn't like it when their brain got mushy because a huge part of their time was spent during the day with their young children. They each said they needed the intellectual stimulation from other adults, it is necessary for their mental well-being.
Before anyone says that volunteer work is stimulating (and it can be), remember each sister has invested thousands of dollars in her education and hrs. of study. It's a serious matter to walk away from that personal investment...perhaps forever.
I also think that because each sister is a licensed health care professional, their skills and knowledge can only be kept best alive and current/up to date by practicing /working in their profession. 1 is a hospital pharmacist who is involved in several clinical drug trial research projects and the other is a physician. Both professions demand practicing it to remain relevant and current. Otherwise it's more cost and headache of studying, retesting for licensing certification later on.
The doctor-sister truly doesn't understand how she could ever be happy by being solely a stay at home mom forever. She has chosen to be a part-time physician and made that choice even before she met her hubby and had children. She wanted to enjoy life more fully (and now with her children) rather than simply reap in a pile of money. I admire her for that. Even on a part-time salary as a physician, it's still a comfortable salary.
The homemaker-sister was a licensed pharmacist also but she gave up her license after being a pharamacist for about 6 yrs. after university. Things haven't been rosy all the time..since she fell into depression for several years. She's out of it but I see an unnecessary defensiveness from her especially now at this stage, with grown children.
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